Ecoer Logo
VOTING POWER100.00%
DOWNVOTE POWER100.00%
RESOURCE CREDITS100.00%
REPUTATION PROGRESS0.00%
Net Worth
21.671USD
HIVE
0.002HIVE
HBD
0.047HBD
Effective Power
66.634HP
├── Own HP
53.246HP
├── Incoming Deleg
+63.488HP
└── Outgoing Deleg
-50.099HP

Detailed Balance

HIVE
balance
0.002HIVE
market_balance
0.000HIVE
savings_balance
0.000HIVE
reward_hive_balance
0.000HIVE
HIVE POWER
Own HP
53.246HP
Delegated Out
50.099HP
Delegation In
63.488HP
Effective Power
66.634HP
Reward HP (pending)
0.000HP
HBD
hbd_balance
0.047HBD
hbd_conversions
0.000HBD
hbd_market_balance
0.000HBD
savings_hbd_balance
0.325HBD
reward_hbd_balance
0.000HBD
{
  "balance": "0.002 HIVE",
  "savings_balance": "0.000 HIVE",
  "reward_hive_balance": "0.000 HIVE",
  "vesting_shares": "86435.507692 VESTS",
  "delegated_vesting_shares": "81327.994845 VESTS",
  "received_vesting_shares": "103061.869652 VESTS",
  "hbd_balance": "0.047 HBD",
  "savings_hbd_balance": "0.325 HBD",
  "reward_hbd_balance": "0.000 HBD"
}

Account Info

namenamok
id1398154
rank0
reputation0
created2020-07-12T06:50:36
recovery_accountsteemmonsters
proxyNone
invited_bynull
post_count388
comment_count0
lifetime_vote_count0
witnesses_voted_for15
last_post2026-05-22T09:44:30
last_root_post2026-05-22T09:44:30
last_vote_time2026-05-24T03:52:15
proxied_vsf_votes0, 0, 0, 0
can_vote1
voting_power9,799
delayed_votesNone
governance_vote_expiration_ts2027-04-24T06:30:24
balance0.002 HIVE
savings_balance0.000 HIVE
hbd_balance0.047 HBD
savings_hbd_balance0.325 HBD
vesting_shares86435.507692 VESTS
delegated_vesting_shares81327.994845 VESTS
received_vesting_shares103061.869652 VESTS
reward_vesting_balance0.000000 VESTS
vesting_balance0.000 HIVE
vesting_withdraw_rate0.000000 VESTS
next_vesting_withdrawal1969-12-31T23:59:59
withdrawn0
to_withdraw0
withdraw_routes0
savings_withdraw_requests0
last_account_recovery1970-01-01T00:00:00
reset_accountnull
last_owner_update1970-01-01T00:00:00
last_account_update2025-06-21T12:59:09
minedNo
hbd_seconds594
hbd_last_interest_payment2021-06-22T10:24:27
savings_hbd_last_interest_payment2025-11-12T19:47:54
{
  "id": 1398154,
  "name": "namok",
  "owner": {
    "weight_threshold": 1,
    "account_auths": [],
    "key_auths": [
      [
        "STM6AyHt8vYmenNj4toXtnptux7yAppFbXjZC4E5Ar6cX3QFmXwUT",
        1
      ]
    ]
  },
  "active": {
    "weight_threshold": 1,
    "account_auths": [],
    "key_auths": [
      [
        "STM72fu8y9SsmxjhVtePjrsbm1ZpmhVeACPCk1dmyT4MKHHvjnNdt",
        1
      ]
    ]
  },
  "posting": {
    "weight_threshold": 1,
    "account_auths": [],
    "key_auths": [
      [
        "STM7QW1MdQ67gkRd46h9mvnQKW3j2qYddBWq9DYxMQZs1ihEVWGe3",
        1
      ]
    ]
  },
  "memo_key": "STM6F8qSmovZs5uHy6hvh9yrnZ2ru6EMAgbdRWBGWttQaGRhiPYEC",
  "json_metadata": "",
  "posting_json_metadata": "",
  "proxy": "",
  "previous_owner_update": "1970-01-01T00:00:00",
  "last_owner_update": "1970-01-01T00:00:00",
  "last_account_update": "2025-06-21T12:59:09",
  "created": "2020-07-12T06:50:36",
  "mined": false,
  "recovery_account": "steemmonsters",
  "last_account_recovery": "1970-01-01T00:00:00",
  "reset_account": "null",
  "comment_count": 0,
  "lifetime_vote_count": 0,
  "post_count": 388,
  "can_vote": true,
  "voting_manabar": {
    "current_mana": 106005994849,
    "last_update_time": 1779594735
  },
  "downvote_manabar": {
    "current_mana": 27042345624,
    "last_update_time": 1779594735
  },
  "voting_power": 9799,
  "balance": "0.002 HIVE",
  "savings_balance": "0.000 HIVE",
  "hbd_balance": "0.047 HBD",
  "hbd_seconds": "594",
  "hbd_seconds_last_update": "2021-06-22T10:24:36",
  "hbd_last_interest_payment": "2021-06-22T10:24:27",
  "savings_hbd_balance": "0.325 HBD",
  "savings_hbd_seconds": "0",
  "savings_hbd_seconds_last_update": "2025-11-12T19:47:54",
  "savings_hbd_last_interest_payment": "2025-11-12T19:47:54",
  "savings_withdraw_requests": 0,
  "reward_hbd_balance": "0.000 HBD",
  "reward_hive_balance": "0.000 HIVE",
  "reward_vesting_balance": "0.000000 VESTS",
  "reward_vesting_hive": "0.000 HIVE",
  "vesting_shares": "86435.507692 VESTS",
  "delegated_vesting_shares": "81327.994845 VESTS",
  "received_vesting_shares": "103061.869652 VESTS",
  "vesting_withdraw_rate": "0.000000 VESTS",
  "post_voting_power": "108169.382499 VESTS",
  "next_vesting_withdrawal": "1969-12-31T23:59:59",
  "withdrawn": 0,
  "to_withdraw": 0,
  "withdraw_routes": 0,
  "pending_transfers": 0,
  "curation_rewards": 293,
  "posting_rewards": 142933,
  "proxied_vsf_votes": [
    0,
    0,
    0,
    0
  ],
  "witnesses_voted_for": 15,
  "last_post": "2026-05-22T09:44:30",
  "last_root_post": "2026-05-22T09:44:30",
  "last_vote_time": "2026-05-24T03:52:15",
  "post_bandwidth": 0,
  "pending_claimed_accounts": 0,
  "governance_vote_expiration_ts": "2027-04-24T06:30:24",
  "delayed_votes": [],
  "open_recurrent_transfers": 0,
  "vesting_balance": "0.000 HIVE",
  "reputation": 0,
  "transfer_history": [],
  "market_history": [],
  "post_history": [],
  "vote_history": [],
  "other_history": [],
  "witness_votes": [
    "arcange",
    "balaz",
    "bdcommunity",
    "blocktrades",
    "bobinson",
    "curie",
    "good-karma",
    "gtg",
    "ocd-witness",
    "qurator",
    "reazuliqbal",
    "steempeak",
    "themarkymark",
    "timcliff",
    "yabapmatt"
  ],
  "tags_usage": [],
  "guest_bloggers": [],
  "rank": 0
}

Withdraw Routes

IncomingOutgoing
Empty
Empty
{
  "incoming": [],
  "outgoing": []
}
From Date
To Date
2026/05/29 09:44:30
authornamok
permlinkempowering-thoughts-or-22nd-may-2026-or-evil-influenced-past-or-god-blessed-future
Transaction InfoBlock #106802384/Virtual Operation 4294967295:2
View Raw JSON Data
{
  "block": 106802384,
  "op": [
    "comment_payout_update",
    {
      "author": "namok",
      "permlink": "empowering-thoughts-or-22nd-may-2026-or-evil-influenced-past-or-god-blessed-future"
    }
  ],
  "op_in_trx": 2,
  "timestamp": "2026-05-29T09:44:30",
  "trx_id": "0000000000000000000000000000000000000000",
  "trx_in_block": 4294967295,
  "virtual_op": true
}
2026/05/24 03:52:18
authoroivas
pending payout0.455 HBD
permlinki-have-been-in-the-futures-market-for-a-year-now
rshares2113387650
total vote weight5773322877491
voternamok
weight1056693825
Transaction InfoBlock #106651720/Trx 820b7e07aab305c48e07c85958344e7f80e23c25
View Raw JSON Data
{
  "block": 106651720,
  "op": [
    "effective_comment_vote",
    {
      "author": "oivas",
      "pending_payout": "0.455 HBD",
      "permlink": "i-have-been-in-the-futures-market-for-a-year-now",
      "rshares": 2113387650,
      "total_vote_weight": 5773322877491,
      "voter": "namok",
      "weight": 1056693825
    }
  ],
  "op_in_trx": 1,
  "timestamp": "2026-05-24T03:52:18",
  "trx_id": "820b7e07aab305c48e07c85958344e7f80e23c25",
  "trx_in_block": 1,
  "virtual_op": true
}
2026/05/24 03:52:18
authoroivas
permlinki-have-been-in-the-futures-market-for-a-year-now
voternamok
weight10000 (100.00%)
Transaction InfoBlock #106651720/Trx 820b7e07aab305c48e07c85958344e7f80e23c25
View Raw JSON Data
{
  "block": 106651720,
  "op": [
    "vote",
    {
      "author": "oivas",
      "permlink": "i-have-been-in-the-futures-market-for-a-year-now",
      "voter": "namok",
      "weight": 10000
    }
  ],
  "op_in_trx": 0,
  "timestamp": "2026-05-24T03:52:18",
  "trx_id": "820b7e07aab305c48e07c85958344e7f80e23c25",
  "trx_in_block": 1,
  "virtual_op": false
}
2026/05/22 09:44:33
authornamok
body<div class="text-justify"> ***Thoughts | Words | And Feelings!*** -------------------------------------------------------------- The easiest thing for the devil to do is to keep us in constant fear of the future, worry of the present and embarrassment of the past. That way we will never be able to look at the future with excitement, joy and fulfilment. We will live and die re-living mediocrity day-after-day. That’s why God is so essential to break the devil and bless us with a prosperous life!! ![Evil Past_Godly Future.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/242DWz4oQ8Mremc91QeUPnaTvLiRbHtkQVKHnP3QMZD5h11cjLE22KEgMNCkBcWQAMSpz.jpg) ![LineDivider_Positive_Trunc.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23xpM5siZKLmPySPXX2X6772E3R1YBWR212924RomUiP48tN6wvoUZpcWTMyMwnegJ8bG.jpg) ## Video https://youtu.be/PTYWYTGNGtE ![LineDivider_Positive_Trunc.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23xpM5siZKLmPySPXX2X6772E3R1YBWR212924RomUiP48tN6wvoUZpcWTMyMwnegJ8bG.jpg) Image Courtesy: None </div>
json metadata{"app":"peakd/2026.5.3","format":"markdown","tags":["god","godlythoughts","evil","jesus","india"],"users":[],"image":["https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/242DWz4oQ8Mremc91QeUPnaTvLiRbHtkQVKHnP3QMZD5h11cjLE22KEgMNCkBcWQAMSpz.jpg","https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23xpM5siZKLmPySPXX2X6772E3R1YBWR212924RomUiP48tN6wvoUZpcWTMyMwnegJ8bG.jpg"]}
parent author
parent permlinkgod
permlinkempowering-thoughts-or-22nd-may-2026-or-evil-influenced-past-or-god-blessed-future
titleEmpowering Thoughts | 22nd May 2026 | Evil Influenced Past | God Blessed Future!
Transaction InfoBlock #106601279/Trx dbf7524d3a0d2701385e0e5f9c0cf99be758ff54
View Raw JSON Data
{
  "block": 106601279,
  "op": [
    "comment",
    {
      "author": "namok",
      "body": "<div class=\"text-justify\">\n\n***Thoughts | Words | And Feelings!***\n\n--------------------------------------------------------------\n\nThe easiest thing for the devil to do is to keep us in constant fear of the future, worry of the present and embarrassment of the past.\n\nThat way we will never be able to look at the future with excitement, joy and fulfilment.\n\nWe will live and die re-living mediocrity day-after-day.\n\nThat’s why God is so essential to break the devil and bless us with a prosperous life!!\n\n\n![Evil Past_Godly Future.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/242DWz4oQ8Mremc91QeUPnaTvLiRbHtkQVKHnP3QMZD5h11cjLE22KEgMNCkBcWQAMSpz.jpg)\n\n\n![LineDivider_Positive_Trunc.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23xpM5siZKLmPySPXX2X6772E3R1YBWR212924RomUiP48tN6wvoUZpcWTMyMwnegJ8bG.jpg)\n\n\n\n## Video\n\nhttps://youtu.be/PTYWYTGNGtE\n\n\n![LineDivider_Positive_Trunc.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23xpM5siZKLmPySPXX2X6772E3R1YBWR212924RomUiP48tN6wvoUZpcWTMyMwnegJ8bG.jpg)\n\nImage Courtesy: None\t\n\n</div>\n",
      "json_metadata": "{\"app\":\"peakd/2026.5.3\",\"format\":\"markdown\",\"tags\":[\"god\",\"godlythoughts\",\"evil\",\"jesus\",\"india\"],\"users\":[],\"image\":[\"https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/242DWz4oQ8Mremc91QeUPnaTvLiRbHtkQVKHnP3QMZD5h11cjLE22KEgMNCkBcWQAMSpz.jpg\",\"https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23xpM5siZKLmPySPXX2X6772E3R1YBWR212924RomUiP48tN6wvoUZpcWTMyMwnegJ8bG.jpg\"]}",
      "parent_author": "",
      "parent_permlink": "god",
      "permlink": "empowering-thoughts-or-22nd-may-2026-or-evil-influenced-past-or-god-blessed-future",
      "title": "Empowering Thoughts | 22nd May 2026 | Evil Influenced Past | God Blessed Future!"
    }
  ],
  "op_in_trx": 0,
  "timestamp": "2026-05-22T09:44:33",
  "trx_id": "dbf7524d3a0d2701385e0e5f9c0cf99be758ff54",
  "trx_in_block": 1,
  "virtual_op": false
}
namokcustom json: sm_claim_rewards
2026/05/18 13:00:42
idsm_claim_rewards
json{"app":"splinterlands/0.7.177","n":"ZgrzVPz6HR"}
required auths[]
required posting auths["namok"]
Transaction InfoBlock #106490253/Trx 226c5e076da6dc9fe8c4eef9ac43344e972227dd
View Raw JSON Data
{
  "block": 106490253,
  "op": [
    "custom_json",
    {
      "id": "sm_claim_rewards",
      "json": "{\"app\":\"splinterlands/0.7.177\",\"n\":\"ZgrzVPz6HR\"}",
      "required_auths": [],
      "required_posting_auths": [
        "namok"
      ]
    }
  ],
  "op_in_trx": 0,
  "timestamp": "2026-05-18T13:00:42",
  "trx_id": "226c5e076da6dc9fe8c4eef9ac43344e972227dd",
  "trx_in_block": 6,
  "virtual_op": false
}
2026/05/16 09:35:51
authornamok
permlinkask-and-you-shall-receive-or-what-about-timid-feelings-and-fears-or-will-it-work-if-i-ask-for-courage-and-bravery
Transaction InfoBlock #106428708/Virtual Operation 4294967295:3
View Raw JSON Data
{
  "block": 106428708,
  "op": [
    "comment_payout_update",
    {
      "author": "namok",
      "permlink": "ask-and-you-shall-receive-or-what-about-timid-feelings-and-fears-or-will-it-work-if-i-ask-for-courage-and-bravery"
    }
  ],
  "op_in_trx": 3,
  "timestamp": "2026-05-16T09:35:51",
  "trx_id": "0000000000000000000000000000000000000000",
  "trx_in_block": 4294967295,
  "virtual_op": true
}
namokcustom json: ssc-mainnet-hive
2026/05/10 18:11:30
idssc-mainnet-hive
json{"contractName":"tokens","contractAction":"transfer","contractPayload":{"symbol":"LBI","to":"oivas","quantity":"10.524","memo":""}}
required auths["namok"]
required posting auths[]
Transaction InfoBlock #106266620/Trx 77081c3633731d7632ce92f559dbabeaf1b2b6f8
View Raw JSON Data
{
  "block": 106266620,
  "op": [
    "custom_json",
    {
      "id": "ssc-mainnet-hive",
      "json": "{\"contractName\":\"tokens\",\"contractAction\":\"transfer\",\"contractPayload\":{\"symbol\":\"LBI\",\"to\":\"oivas\",\"quantity\":\"10.524\",\"memo\":\"\"}}",
      "required_auths": [
        "namok"
      ],
      "required_posting_auths": []
    }
  ],
  "op_in_trx": 0,
  "timestamp": "2026-05-10T18:11:30",
  "trx_id": "77081c3633731d7632ce92f559dbabeaf1b2b6f8",
  "trx_in_block": 53,
  "virtual_op": false
}
2026/05/09 16:09:09
authorhivewatchers
bodyHello. Welcome back to Hive. Thank you for publishing your content and for being part of the community and publishing on Hive. We’re glad to have you here! To help you make the most of your experience, I recommend checking out these quick guides: Hive Guide 101: [Hive 101](https://jryze.me/hive/) AI Guide: [AI-Generated Content = Not Original Content](https://hivel.ink/ai/@hivewatchers/ai-generated-content-not-original-content) Plagiarism Guide: [Why and How People Abuse and Plagiarise](https://hivel.ink/hivewatchers/@hivewatchers/why-and-how-people-abuse-and-plagiarise) Also, please read this important guide about phishing threats in the Hive ecosystem: [Fake Hive Aidrops And Scams](https://hive.blog/hivewatchers/@hivewatchers/fake-hive-airdrop-and-giveaway-scams-don-t-click-on-links-hive-never-creates-any-airdrops-or-giveaways) Thank you.
json metadata{"links":["https://jryze.me/hive/"],"app":"hiveblog/0.1"}
parent authornamok
parent permlinkask-and-you-shall-receive-or-what-about-timid-feelings-and-fears-or-will-it-work-if-i-ask-for-courage-and-bravery
permlinktes25q
title
Transaction InfoBlock #106235456/Trx 6b8b4af9ba5f5069f4db934751c0004d3c78d37c
View Raw JSON Data
{
  "block": 106235456,
  "op": [
    "comment",
    {
      "author": "hivewatchers",
      "body": "Hello.\nWelcome back to Hive.\n\nThank you for publishing your content and for being part of the community and publishing on Hive. We’re glad to have you here!\n\nTo help you make the most of your experience, I recommend checking out these quick guides:\n\nHive Guide 101: [Hive 101](https://jryze.me/hive/)\n\nAI Guide: [AI-Generated Content = Not Original Content](https://hivel.ink/ai/@hivewatchers/ai-generated-content-not-original-content)\n\nPlagiarism Guide: [Why and How People Abuse and Plagiarise](https://hivel.ink/hivewatchers/@hivewatchers/why-and-how-people-abuse-and-plagiarise)\n\nAlso, please read this important guide about phishing threats in the Hive ecosystem:\n[Fake Hive Aidrops And Scams](https://hive.blog/hivewatchers/@hivewatchers/fake-hive-airdrop-and-giveaway-scams-don-t-click-on-links-hive-never-creates-any-airdrops-or-giveaways)\n\nThank you.",
      "json_metadata": "{\"links\":[\"https://jryze.me/hive/\"],\"app\":\"hiveblog/0.1\"}",
      "parent_author": "namok",
      "parent_permlink": "ask-and-you-shall-receive-or-what-about-timid-feelings-and-fears-or-will-it-work-if-i-ask-for-courage-and-bravery",
      "permlink": "tes25q",
      "title": ""
    }
  ],
  "op_in_trx": 0,
  "timestamp": "2026-05-09T16:09:09",
  "trx_id": "6b8b4af9ba5f5069f4db934751c0004d3c78d37c",
  "trx_in_block": 10,
  "virtual_op": false
}
2026/05/09 09:36:51
authornamok
pending payout0.006 HBD
permlinkask-and-you-shall-receive-or-what-about-timid-feelings-and-fears-or-will-it-work-if-i-ask-for-courage-and-bravery
rshares392387302
total vote weight70984386232
voterhive-103505
weight392387302
Transaction InfoBlock #106227631/Trx 2895de54a8aa11a2ce671256a047a4658ac35ddd
View Raw JSON Data
{
  "block": 106227631,
  "op": [
    "effective_comment_vote",
    {
      "author": "namok",
      "pending_payout": "0.006 HBD",
      "permlink": "ask-and-you-shall-receive-or-what-about-timid-feelings-and-fears-or-will-it-work-if-i-ask-for-courage-and-bravery",
      "rshares": 392387302,
      "total_vote_weight": 70984386232,
      "voter": "hive-103505",
      "weight": 392387302
    }
  ],
  "op_in_trx": 3,
  "timestamp": "2026-05-09T09:36:51",
  "trx_id": "2895de54a8aa11a2ce671256a047a4658ac35ddd",
  "trx_in_block": 6,
  "virtual_op": true
}
2026/05/09 09:36:51
authornamok
permlinkask-and-you-shall-receive-or-what-about-timid-feelings-and-fears-or-will-it-work-if-i-ask-for-courage-and-bravery
voterhive-103505
weight750 (7.50%)
Transaction InfoBlock #106227631/Trx 2895de54a8aa11a2ce671256a047a4658ac35ddd
View Raw JSON Data
{
  "block": 106227631,
  "op": [
    "vote",
    {
      "author": "namok",
      "permlink": "ask-and-you-shall-receive-or-what-about-timid-feelings-and-fears-or-will-it-work-if-i-ask-for-courage-and-bravery",
      "voter": "hive-103505",
      "weight": 750
    }
  ],
  "op_in_trx": 2,
  "timestamp": "2026-05-09T09:36:51",
  "trx_id": "2895de54a8aa11a2ce671256a047a4658ac35ddd",
  "trx_in_block": 6,
  "virtual_op": false
}
2026/05/09 09:36:51
authornamok
pending payout0.006 HBD
permlinkask-and-you-shall-receive-or-what-about-timid-feelings-and-fears-or-will-it-work-if-i-ask-for-courage-and-bravery
rshares72216662
total vote weight70591998930
voterpsychophilo
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authornamok
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2026/05/09 09:36:45
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2026/05/09 09:36:03
authornamok
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2026/05/09 09:36:03
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2026/05/09 09:35:54
authornamok
body<div class="text-justify"> # Ask and You Shall Receive | Took Me A Long Time to Believe This Yeah, let's get down to basics. Ask and you shall receive is Biblical, and I, for some reason, kept the Bible at arm's length. You can ask me why, and I will tell you that the ungodly did not want me to go to the Bible at all. Because when the Bible starts to make sense, then the ungodly have to find a new home. Till such time, I was its home. Reading the Bible is not equal to trusting the Bible. Going to Church every Sunday is not equal to trusting God. This took me some time to get. Now that we are in it, what is trust or trusting all about? Let me explain it as I see it. If I can go through an event, situation, or challenge and I feel secure that someone's got my back, then I am trusting. That someone is the God of the Bible. The more I get into situations which seem insurmountable and the more I pray and trust, the more it gets resolved. Sometimes, even without me doing anything, or let me correct that, most of the time without me doing much of anything. ![Jesus Gives Strength_Grok.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23xVK4warN2bSweJM5MLk52Cdq6Lios3Uh2UXHgVkhTKTZr44ewivZFX6toUHbRuX71Dr.jpg) Now, that's trust - trusting that God's got your back and that you can ask what you want in prayer in Jesus Christ's name and that it will be answered. Why? Because it is written. Jesus said that to the devil, who came to tempt Him. Every time the devil asked him to do something, Jesus shot back with clarification, stating that "it is written". So, I assumed that "it is written" must be powerful. What is written has to happen. As simple as that. That said, what can I take to God in prayer and/or asks? ![LineDivider_Spirit_Trunc.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23z7d8RsQQNbLHS5EvnnPFaekH2sWD3htd17LfAp4JbqojB7u6YArniQJHv8ckKSH817d.jpg) # Can't Ask For Feelings and Mindset | Shouldn't I Control My Feelings and Mindset? For a long time, I was of the opinion that I could ask God only a few things or things above a certain level, and nothing too downright ridiculous. Meaning, asking for a job was fine, but asking for boldness to face a situation or asking for a mindset where I wake up every day expecting the best is out of bounds. Why? Because if I am going to ask for a mindset or feelings as well, then what am I doing in this world at all? But that's where I was wrong. Asking for feelings and mindset is much more important than asking for a job. Both will be granted for sure, but the former is more important. Let me explain how. Let's say you are in a race and on that race course, your competitors have a clear path, but you have a dog standing in your path. You may have to wrestle it or jump over it or veer around it to get to your finish line. That is a bit unfair to you since the others have a clear path. That "dog" is your feelings and mindset, which distracts your focus from the finish line. Whereas your competitors can stay focused on the finish line. Who do you think will win? Who do you think is disadvantaged? You know the answer, don't you? So, you see why you have to deal with the feelings and mindset first. Ask for a better mindset and feelings in Jesus' mighty name. It will be done. Once the obstacle is removed, can't you now focus on the finish line? Can't you have real goals and stay focused on them? Can't you focus and move forward with intent? You sure can. This realization made me understand that the ungodly wanted me to forever wrestle with the dog while the world flew past. Don't fall for it. You are made to fly, so fly. Nothing less than that! ![LineDivider_Spirit_Trunc.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23z7d8RsQQNbLHS5EvnnPFaekH2sWD3htd17LfAp4JbqojB7u6YArniQJHv8ckKSH817d.jpg) # Ask Whatever You Want to Ask | And Then Boldly Trust and Go Forth in Life So, there is nothing out of bounds in asking God. You can ask for a clear mindset as much as ask to win the race. Both are asks, and you can trust God's hand in your life. Don't let the ungodly tell you that you can't ask for victory, as that would mean that you don't do the work. It's actually the opposite. The ask for victory and the following belief in it, moves me forward to train and grow stronger to win. I no longer wrestle the dog. I deal with the track. That's the difference when God has your back. So, get this straight and get this right. God is true. God is trustworthy, and God answers prayers. Most of all, God is always listening. Go talk to Him, believe in Him. And….. … enjoy your life!! 😊 😊 ![LineDivider_Spirit_Trunc.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23z7d8RsQQNbLHS5EvnnPFaekH2sWD3htd17LfAp4JbqojB7u6YArniQJHv8ckKSH817d.jpg) Image Courtesy: Jesus Gives Strength - Grok </div>
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      "body": "<div class=\"text-justify\">\n\n# Ask and You Shall Receive | Took Me A Long Time to Believe This\n\nYeah, let's get down to basics. Ask and you shall receive is Biblical, and I, for some reason, kept the Bible at arm's length. You can ask me why, and I will tell you that the ungodly did not want me to go to the Bible at all. Because when the Bible starts to make sense, then the ungodly have to find a new home. Till such time, I was its home.\n\nReading the Bible is not equal to trusting the Bible. Going to Church every Sunday is not equal to trusting God. This took me some time to get. Now that we are in it, what is trust or trusting all about? Let me explain it as I see it. If I can go through an event, situation, or challenge and I feel secure that someone's got my back, then I am trusting. That someone is the God of the Bible. The more I get into situations which seem insurmountable and the more I pray and trust, the more it gets resolved. Sometimes, even without me doing anything, or let me correct that, most of the time without me doing much of anything.\n\n![Jesus Gives Strength_Grok.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23xVK4warN2bSweJM5MLk52Cdq6Lios3Uh2UXHgVkhTKTZr44ewivZFX6toUHbRuX71Dr.jpg)\n\nNow, that's trust - trusting that God's got your back and that you can ask what you want in prayer in Jesus Christ's name and that it will be answered. Why? Because it is written. Jesus said that to the devil, who came to tempt Him. Every time the devil asked him to do something, Jesus shot back with clarification, stating that \"it is written\". So, I assumed that \"it is written\" must be powerful.\n\nWhat is written has to happen. As simple as that. That said, what can I take to God in prayer and/or asks?\n\n![LineDivider_Spirit_Trunc.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23z7d8RsQQNbLHS5EvnnPFaekH2sWD3htd17LfAp4JbqojB7u6YArniQJHv8ckKSH817d.jpg)\n\n# Can't Ask For Feelings and Mindset | Shouldn't I Control My Feelings and Mindset?\n\nFor a long time, I was of the opinion that I could ask God only a few things or things above a certain level, and nothing too downright ridiculous. Meaning, asking for a job was fine, but asking for boldness to face a situation or asking for a mindset where I wake up every day expecting the best is out of bounds. Why? Because if I am going to ask for a mindset or feelings as well, then what am I doing in this world at all?\n\nBut that's where I was wrong. Asking for feelings and mindset is much more important than asking for a job. Both will be granted for sure, but the former is more important. Let me explain how. Let's say you are in a race and on that race course, your competitors have a clear path, but you have a dog standing in your path. You may have to wrestle it or jump over it or veer around it to get to your finish line. That is a bit unfair to you since the others have a clear path. That \"dog\" is your feelings and mindset, which distracts your focus from the finish line. Whereas your competitors can stay focused on the finish line. Who do you think will win? Who do you think is disadvantaged? You know the answer, don't you?\n\nSo, you see why you have to deal with the feelings and mindset first. Ask for a better mindset and feelings in Jesus' mighty name. It will be done. Once the obstacle is removed, can't you now focus on the finish line? Can't you have real goals and stay focused on them? Can't you focus and move forward with intent? You sure can.\n\nThis realization made me understand that the ungodly wanted me to forever wrestle with the dog while the world flew past. Don't fall for it. You are made to fly, so fly. Nothing less than that!\n\n![LineDivider_Spirit_Trunc.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23z7d8RsQQNbLHS5EvnnPFaekH2sWD3htd17LfAp4JbqojB7u6YArniQJHv8ckKSH817d.jpg)\n\n# Ask Whatever You Want to Ask | And Then Boldly Trust and Go Forth in Life\n\nSo, there is nothing out of bounds in asking God. You can ask for a clear mindset as much as ask to win the race. Both are asks, and you can trust God's hand in your life. Don't let the ungodly tell you that you can't ask for victory, as that would mean that you don't do the work. It's actually the opposite. The ask for victory and the following belief in it, moves me forward to train and grow stronger to win. I no longer wrestle the dog. I deal with the track. That's the difference when God has your back.\n\nSo, get this straight and get this right. God is true. God is trustworthy, and God answers prayers. Most of all, God is always listening. Go talk to Him, believe in Him. And…..\n\n… enjoy your life!! 😊 😊\n\n![LineDivider_Spirit_Trunc.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23z7d8RsQQNbLHS5EvnnPFaekH2sWD3htd17LfAp4JbqojB7u6YArniQJHv8ckKSH817d.jpg)\n\nImage Courtesy: Jesus Gives Strength - Grok\n\n</div>",
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2026/05/08 17:42:45
authornamok
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2026/05/08 03:58:06
authornamok
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      "body": "@@ -417,17 +417,16 @@\n e today.\n- \n %0A%0AThis n\n",
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namokvoted for witness @ocd-witness
2026/04/24 06:30:27
accountnamok
approvetrue
witnessocd-witness
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namokcustom json: sm_token_transfer
2026/01/21 09:52:42
idsm_token_transfer
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Transaction InfoBlock #103125286/Trx febed140c069b861d1f6db1b834e83d00a113734
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namokcustom json: sm_accept_tos
2026/01/21 09:51:48
idsm_accept_tos
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namokclaimed reward balance: 0.006 HBD, 0.064 HP
2026/01/21 09:49:39
accountnamok
reward hbd0.006 HBD
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2026/01/19 14:51:12
authornamok
permlinkprayer-raises-you-above-the-noise-level-or-when-that-happens-or-you-can-sense-the-difference-between-the-good-voice-and-the-bad-
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2026/01/19 14:51:12
authornamok
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2026/01/19 14:51:12
authornamok
curators vesting payout205.149449 VESTS
hbd payout0.006 HBD
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2026/01/12 16:05:03
authorhivebuzz
bodyCongratulations @namok! You have completed the following achievement on the Hive blockchain And have been rewarded with New badge(s) <table><tr><td><img src="https://images.hive.blog/60x70/https://hivebuzz.me/@namok/posts.png?202601121602"></td><td>You published more than 350 posts.<br>Your next target is to reach 400 posts.</td></tr> </table> <sub>_You can view your badges on [your board](https://hivebuzz.me/@namok) and compare yourself to others in the [Ranking](https://hivebuzz.me/ranking)_</sub> <sub>_If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word_ `STOP`</sub>
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permlinknotify-1768233902
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2026/01/12 15:24:51
authornamok
pending payout0.026 HBD
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2026/01/12 15:24:51
authornamok
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2026/01/12 14:51:15
authornamok
body<div class="text-justify"> # Noise Level Back in my college days, we used to have an interesting concept called the “noise level” in physics. What is it? It simply means that there is an inherent noise level in our environment under which any signal that we present won’t be clearly heard. This concept was true at the time of discovering the superheterodyne receiver as much as discerning audio signals from space today. This noise level is true even in our lives. There is a continuous chatter on in our minds. All the thoughts and experiences run a 24 by 7 audio channel in our head. Above that, there is the voice from God and the noise from the ungodly. God’s voice through the Holy Spirit is clear and usually above the noise level in my experience. The only need is our willingness to listen. But the other voice is the problem. ![Evil Whisper Mohamed_hassan Pixab.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23wzzLDyZ35yqpySKNan1xHRvdrWAVSXC2W13hDSxijSJM63JSAbPv5Ek7DHLx5oW3A4J.png) The ungodly voice operates at the noise level and creeps up with thoughts and suggestions as if it were our own. So, with all our experiences that we are replaying in our minds, the ungodly continues to make those experiences sour by opening up its own unruly chatter. Here’s where the problem starts. ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # Noise Level Takes Over | And Becomes the Only Voice It took me a long time to realize that the noise level chatters were the grass under which the serpent hid and kept whispering in the dark. The chatter soon became debilitating until the whispers were the only thing left in my head. To make matters worse, I was moving away from God around this period. A perfect crucible for the ungodly’s experiments, and I was the subject. During this phase, it was difficult to tell the difference between our thoughts and the ungodly’s whispers. For example: > I would be thinking about the award that I received for my performance and playing that episode in my head.. And… > Out of nowhere, another thought would emerge, which would go something like - Yeah, the award was good, but I didn’t look great, or the shirt was soiled, or others think that I didn’t deserve it, or I just got it because I am close to the boss, or some other useless thought related to the award. And all of these happened to me. The first part was the original thought, and the second part, though it also seems like my own assessment of the event, was clearly not from me. How do I know? Because I listened to it and found myself in depression. These are the classic self-sabotage ingredients that come together to put us down. Just that some of those suggestions are not our thoughts. You would argue that this happens with everyone, but not everyone goes into depression. True. And I went into depression because I distanced myself from God. The only shield in my life, I chose to put down and allowed myself to be attacked. But there lies the good news, too. God does prune away the grass and shows us the ungodly. But for that, you need to pray! ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # Prayer - the Lawn Mower | God - the ungodly Destroyer It is funny that I came up with the example of prayer being the lawn mower, and it is. Prayer is not just the lawn mower, but also the noise cancellation power. The noise level gets destroyed by prayer. In either case, the chatter in the head stops. And what does that do? It exposes the whispers. When prayer colors the background of our life, it highlights the whispers. We get to know that it is not our voice (or thought). Then the next job becomes easier. All we have to do is to “rebuke” the thought and “command” the thought and the evil spirit behind the thought to leave us and go fall in the fires of hell, by the Mighty and Holy Name of Jesus Christ. And it works. It worked wonders in my life. I didn’t know that the chatters in the head could be stopped. Without the grass, the serpent cannot come close without being detected. And if it can’t come close, it can’t manipulate our thoughts. And then, guess what we are ready to hear? The voice of God. This is what prayer does. It destroys the chatter and installs “God’s Voice”, the Holy Spirit’s call!! I have learnt from my mistakes. No more prayerless life. God and his protection are non-negotiable for me. I will do everything in my power to stay in God’s grace through prayer! And I think you should, too. ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) Image Courtesy: Mohamed_hassan at Pixabay(dot)com </div>
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permlinkprayer-raises-you-above-the-noise-level-or-when-that-happens-or-you-can-sense-the-difference-between-the-good-voice-and-the-bad-
titlePrayer Raises You Above the Noise Level | When That Happens | You Can Sense the Difference Between the Good Voice and the Bad One
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      "body": "<div class=\"text-justify\">\n\n#  Noise Level\n\nBack in my college days, we used to have an interesting concept called the “noise level” in physics. What is it? It simply means that there is an inherent noise level in our environment under which any signal that we present won’t be clearly heard. This concept was true at the time of discovering the superheterodyne receiver as much as discerning audio signals from space today. \n\nThis noise level is true even in our lives. There is a continuous chatter on in our minds. All the thoughts and experiences run a 24 by 7 audio channel in our head. Above that, there is the voice from God and the noise from the ungodly. God’s voice through the Holy Spirit is clear and usually above the noise level in my experience. The only need is our willingness to listen. But the other voice is the problem.\n\n\n![Evil Whisper Mohamed_hassan Pixab.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23wzzLDyZ35yqpySKNan1xHRvdrWAVSXC2W13hDSxijSJM63JSAbPv5Ek7DHLx5oW3A4J.png)\n\n\nThe ungodly voice operates at the noise level and creeps up with thoughts and suggestions as if it were our own. So, with all our experiences that we are replaying in our minds, the ungodly continues to make those experiences sour by opening up its own unruly chatter.\n\nHere’s where the problem starts.\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n#  Noise Level Takes Over | And Becomes the Only Voice\n\nIt took me a long time to realize that the noise level chatters were the grass under which the serpent hid and kept whispering in the dark. The chatter soon became debilitating until the whispers were the only thing left in my head. To make matters worse, I was moving away from God around this period. A perfect crucible for the ungodly’s experiments, and I was the subject.\n\nDuring this phase, it was difficult to tell the difference between our thoughts and the ungodly’s whispers. For example:\n\n> I would be thinking about the award that I received for my performance and playing that episode in my head..\n\nAnd…\n\n> Out of nowhere, another thought would emerge, which would go something like - Yeah, the award was good, but I didn’t look great, or the shirt was soiled, or others think that I didn’t deserve it, or I just got it because I am close to the boss, or some other useless thought related to the award. \n\nAnd all of these happened to me. The first part was the original thought, and the second part, though it also seems like my own assessment of the event, was clearly not from me. How do I know? Because I listened to it and found myself in depression. These are the classic self-sabotage ingredients that come together to put us down. Just that some of those suggestions are not our thoughts.\n\nYou would argue that this happens with everyone, but not everyone goes into depression. True. And I went into depression because I distanced myself from God. The only shield in my life, I chose to put down and allowed myself to be attacked. But there lies the good news, too. God does prune away the grass and shows us the ungodly.\n\nBut for that, you need to pray!\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n# Prayer - the Lawn Mower | God - the ungodly Destroyer\n\nIt is funny that I came up with the example of prayer being the lawn mower, and it is. Prayer is not just the lawn mower, but also the noise cancellation power. The noise level gets destroyed by prayer. In either case, the chatter in the head stops. And what does that do?\n\nIt exposes the whispers. When prayer colors the background of our life, it highlights the whispers. We get to know that it is not our voice (or thought). Then the next job becomes easier. All we have to do is to “rebuke” the thought and “command” the thought and the evil spirit behind the thought to leave us and go fall in the fires of hell, by the Mighty and Holy Name of Jesus Christ. And it works. It worked wonders in my life. \n\nI didn’t know that the chatters in the head could be stopped. Without the grass, the serpent cannot come close without being detected. And if it can’t come close, it can’t manipulate our thoughts. And then, guess what we are ready to hear? The voice of God.\n\nThis is what prayer does. It destroys the chatter and installs “God’s Voice”, the Holy Spirit’s call!! I have learnt from my mistakes. No more prayerless life. God and his protection are non-negotiable for me. I will do everything in my power to stay in God’s grace through prayer! And I think you should, too.\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n\nImage Courtesy: Mohamed_hassan at Pixabay(dot)com\n\n</div>\n",
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namokcustom json: notify
2026/01/12 14:01:45
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2026/01/07 16:40:33
authornamok
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2026/01/05 15:13:18
authornamok
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2026/01/03 05:12:42
authornamok
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2025/12/31 16:40:36
authornamok
body<div class="text-justify"> # Growing Up | Prayer Was Too Much Effort The growing-up days were all about playing and having fun. But Mom used to ask me to pray all the while. My elder sister was different. She used to play and also pray. I used to find that strange. How could she be taking time out from the fun times to pray? Prayer to me was an arduous task and one that was devoid of fun. There were too many rules, and it had to be done only because Mom insisted. Even then, when Mom did not bother to ask, I did not bother to pray. Even my sister would ask me to pray. I was least interested. I just didn’t like it. ![Running Away from God_Grok.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23w2qfWPkd8oo786o6tAVAfqkPzWE39TMPPmq5c5Cjowdwd56YW2KFVzZ4VawgfZru4Rk.jpeg) Prayer was about a process to be finished rather than a Father to be spoken to. Sadly enough, I saw prayer as nothing different than school homework. It had to be done otherwise, there would be punishment. I used to do both prayer and homework, but did not enjoy either. This is where I went wrong in building a relationship with my Heavenly Father. It would take me many more years to realize how silly I was and what a relationship I passed in my younger days. The good news is, I am still here and have been given another opportunity by my Father to make amends and straighten my path. But the opportunity did not come by until I realized that I needed it. ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # The Shaky Life | The Depressed Life A lack of relationship with the Father took its toll. Prayer was the last thing on my mind. It was something to be done when every other aspect of life was taken care of. In other words, something to do for fifteen seconds before going to sleep. I was so bad with God that I didn’t even keep a promise that I made to Him as a kid. I had covered that in the previous article, and those interested can read it here: [Thorn in the Throat | Betrayed Promise | Depression | God’s Saving | Single Story Connected Experience | by Awakenedgyani | Dec, 2025 | Medium](https://awakenedgyani.medium.com/thorn-in-the-throat-betrayed-promise-depression-gods-saving-single-story-connected-d5ec7d2c880b) The one true aspect of distancing from God that I didn’t realize is that I was growing closer to the ungodly. Unlike God, where we have a choice to be with Him, there is no such choice with the ungodly. The ungodly will take every available opportunity to hijack and ruin our lives. There is no invitation required. And yet I gave the best invitation to it by keeping God away from me. The ungodly, demon, devil, evil spirit, or whatever you call it, had a field day in my life. Depression was one of the last of the debilitating outcomes. I call it last since the devil does not stop at depression. I had suicidal thoughts. That’s how it would have been victorious. But then God saved me. Despite not deserving it, God touched my life. He did use my wife, my friends, and my therapist to reach me, but His Hands were unmistakable. How could I have known Jesus and yet choose to distance myself from Him? God’s Grace that was ever shining in my life, despite my disinterest in Him, how could I have been blind to it? Prayer felt like a cry for help for the first time. I could sense that prayer was me calling out to the Creator of the Universe. I was desperate. If I had had the right perspective about God earlier in life, my life would have been such a beautiful time. I lost that time. However, I am glad that I am able to see God’s presence in my life now. But the experience without God and with God is extremely different. I intend to share it here. ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # Talking to God | Peace, Acceptance, and Intelligence Follows While many would understand peace and acceptance of oneself, it would be a bit odd that I also put intelligence in the mix. That’s because the Bible says so: > The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom – Proverbs 9:10 I have grown to understand this a lot better now. I used to ask myself early on in my life why I should fear God. Shouldn’t I be loving God? True, love God but also fear Him. We loved our parents and yet feared them as kids, didn’t we? Didn’t that make us good kids? Then how is this any different? Anyway, I was talking about my experience. What changed? Here’s what’s happened. I am on my business journey, and over the last two years, the visible difference is how I am approaching the same business. Nothing has changed. Same parameters, same challenges, same work to be done, and same output expectations. Let me clarify how things were for the most part of my business while I was away from God. It was driven with anxiety, feelings of inadequacy, doubts about myself, debilitating mental attacks on my work, extreme pessimism, lack of interest in getting started, procrastination, and not achieving the result I had set out to achieve. With God, the picture was different. Remember, nothing had changed when I embraced God Almighty, Jesus my Savior, and the Holy Spirit. But the perspective did change. There was a new energy to look at my business, ideas that seemed to come out of nowhere, joy in my work, peace and a relaxed mind, sharp focus, believing that I can succeed, opportunities in the same work environment (wonder where they were hiding before), immense optimism, and an assured feeling of victory. As I said, nothing physically had changed, but my mental faculty is running at light speed. I am loving it. This is what God’s grace in my life looked like. Now tell me, why wouldn’t I want more of this? More importantly, why didn’t I listen to my Mom as a kid? 😊 It’s good that I am back on track, and all thanks to God. I recommend that all of you’ll should taste and see that the LORD is good. You will love it just like me!! ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) Image Courtesy: Running Away from God | Image Created using Grok </div>
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permlinkdoes-prayer-actually-deliver-or-the-younger-phase-or-the-depression-phase-or-the-prayer-phase
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      "body": "<div class=\"text-justify\">\n\n#  Growing Up | Prayer Was Too Much Effort\n\nThe growing-up days were all about playing and having fun. But Mom used to ask me to pray all the while. My elder sister was different. She used to play and also pray. I used to find that strange. How could she be taking time out from the fun times to pray?\n\nPrayer to me was an arduous task and one that was devoid of fun. There were too many rules, and it had to be done only because Mom insisted. Even then, when Mom did not bother to ask, I did not bother to pray. Even my sister would ask me to pray. I was least interested. I just didn’t like it. \n\n\n![Running Away from God_Grok.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23w2qfWPkd8oo786o6tAVAfqkPzWE39TMPPmq5c5Cjowdwd56YW2KFVzZ4VawgfZru4Rk.jpeg)\n\n\nPrayer was about a process to be finished rather than a Father to be spoken to. Sadly enough, I saw prayer as nothing different than school homework. It had to be done otherwise, there would be punishment. I used to do both prayer and homework, but did not enjoy either. This is where I went wrong in building a relationship with my Heavenly Father. It would take me many more years to realize how silly I was and what a relationship I passed in my younger days.\n\nThe good news is, I am still here and have been given another opportunity by my Father to make amends and straighten my path. But the opportunity did not come by until I realized that I needed it.\n\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n#  The Shaky Life | The Depressed Life\n\nA lack of relationship with the Father took its toll. Prayer was the last thing on my mind. It was something to be done when every other aspect of life was taken care of. In other words, something to do for fifteen seconds before going to sleep. I was so bad with God that I didn’t even keep a promise that I made to Him as a kid. I had covered that in the previous article, and those interested can read it here:\n\n[Thorn in the Throat | Betrayed Promise | Depression | God’s Saving | Single Story Connected Experience | by Awakenedgyani | Dec, 2025 | Medium](https://awakenedgyani.medium.com/thorn-in-the-throat-betrayed-promise-depression-gods-saving-single-story-connected-d5ec7d2c880b)\n\nThe one true aspect of distancing from God that I didn’t realize is that I was growing closer to the ungodly. Unlike God, where we have a choice to be with Him, there is no such choice with the ungodly. The ungodly will take every available opportunity to hijack and ruin our lives. There is no invitation required. And yet I gave the best invitation to it by keeping God away from me. The ungodly, demon, devil, evil spirit, or whatever you call it, had a field day in my life. Depression was one of the last of the debilitating outcomes. I call it last since the devil does not stop at depression. I had suicidal thoughts. That’s how it would have been victorious. But then God saved me. \n\nDespite not deserving it, God touched my life. He did use my wife, my friends, and my therapist to reach me, but His Hands were unmistakable. How could I have known Jesus and yet choose to distance myself from Him? God’s Grace that was ever shining in my life, despite my disinterest in Him, how could I have been blind to it?\n\nPrayer felt like a cry for help for the first time. I could sense that prayer was me calling out to the Creator of the Universe. I was desperate. If I had had the right perspective about God earlier in life, my life would have been such a beautiful time. I lost that time. However, I am glad that I am able to see God’s presence in my life now.\n\nBut the experience without God and with God is extremely different. I intend to share it here. \n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n# Talking to God | Peace, Acceptance, and Intelligence Follows\n\nWhile many would understand peace and acceptance of oneself, it would be a bit odd that I also put intelligence in the mix. That’s because the Bible says so:\n\n> The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom – Proverbs 9:10\n\nI have grown to understand this a lot better now. I used to ask myself early on in my life why I should fear God. Shouldn’t I be loving God? True, love God but also fear Him. We loved our parents and yet feared them as kids, didn’t we? Didn’t that make us good kids? Then how is this any different?\n\nAnyway, I was talking about my experience. What changed? Here’s what’s happened. I am on my business journey, and over the last two years, the visible difference is how I am approaching the same business. 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There was a new energy to look at my business, ideas that seemed to come out of nowhere, joy in my work, peace and a relaxed mind, sharp focus, believing that I can succeed, opportunities in the same work environment (wonder where they were hiding before), immense optimism, and an assured feeling of victory.\n\nAs I said, nothing physically had changed, but my mental faculty is running at light speed. I am loving it. This is what God’s grace in my life looked like. Now tell me, why wouldn’t I want more of this? More importantly, why didn’t I listen to my Mom as a kid? 😊\n\nIt’s good that I am back on track, and all thanks to God. I recommend that all of you’ll should taste and see that the LORD is good. You will love it just like me!!\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n\nImage Courtesy: Running Away from God | Image Created using Grok\n\n</div>\n",
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2025/12/29 15:16:12
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2025/12/29 15:13:36
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2025/12/29 15:13:30
authornamok
permlinkthorn-in-the-throat-or-betrayed-promise-or-depression-or-gods-saving-or-single-story-connected-experience
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2025/12/29 15:13:21
authornamok
body<div class="text-justify"> # Thorn in the Throat I think I was ten or eleven years old when, while having my food, a fish bone decided to lodge itself in my throat. Now, that wasn’t new. Like any fish-eating human, it was expected to happen, had happened to me before, but it eventually got washed down the throat. So, it was a momentary pain, and then it was all fine. Not this time, though. For some reason, this fish bone had a bone to pick. It wouldn’t budge. I could feel the painful prick each time I swallowed. We tried everything – swallowing a handful of rice, a banana, drinking water, and repeating each one at least three times. It didn’t work. To make matters worse, it was nighttime. There would be no doctors. If I needed medical help, then a hospital was the only solution. The hospital is a place we went to if there was something seriously wrong, not for trivial issues. ![Thorn in Throat_AI_Grok.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23vi6K7nhbCcmbFgyquRRnLzoyyR76F9RS3R8sEJJtXHujLpJnBLworHU6XC9DqqiPXPs.jpeg) <u>Image Made on Grok | AI</u> It looked like the hospital was very much on the cards. I could see my dad tense, mom worried, sis confused, and I was s*it scared. I didn’t know what to do. I could feel the pain just while swallowing my saliva. But if I said I felt the pain, then everybody around me would continue to be worried, and at that point, the only alternative was not an alternative at all. I think that was my first memory of making a decision, a painful one. I lied that the thorn had washed down. It hadn’t, but the relief at home was worth it, and of course, a temporary relief for me. The problem wasn’t over, though. ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # Prayed to Mother Mary | Promised Something | Thorn Gone | Promise Broken So long as I didn’t swallow, there wasn’t any pain. But swallowing your saliva was partly a natural habit. I was scared to do that, though. I went to bed, but I don’t remember how I fell asleep. The next day, being a Thursday, was a school weekly off. So, it was a day to get up late. Not for me. I probably swallowed, and that prick woke me up. Since everyone was sleeping, now was my chance to explore and see if I could do something about it. I took a torch and looked into my mouth in the mirror. I could see the thorn. I tried reaching it, and surprisingly, my index finger touched it. I could feel it, but couldn’t move it. I was in tears. And then I made the first promise of my life. I had made some earlier also, but I distinctly remember not keeping it. Come on now, I was only ten. But this promise was to Mother Mary. I didn’t know I had to keep it. I remember praying to Mother Mary: > “Please let this thorn go, and I will do one Rosary every day for the rest of my life.” Now, this may sound dramatic and miraculous, but I AM NOT JOKING. It wouldn’t have been even half a minute of me praying as above, and the next swallow, I was at ease. I couldn’t believe it. I saw in the mirror once again. The thorn was gone. I turned to Mother Mary and profusely thanked her. And, of course, did the first Rosary then and there. But I don’t think I went past even half a week before I gave excuses to myself to do the rosary. I literally broke the promise. I remembered it, yet never bothered to make my promise good. ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # Unkept Promises With People? | No Repercussions | Unkept Promises With Divinity? | What Do You Think Happens? The thorn in the throat episode passed away, but the feeling of relief never did. Even growing up, as a youth, an adult, a married man, and later, a father, I never forgot the promise that I did not keep. And even then, I wouldn’t do the rosary regularly. I would do it as and when I pleased. Normally, prayer was a fifteen-second affair for me, and the Rosary was a full ten to fifteen minutes long. So, I thought that the fifteen minutes weren’t time well invested. I was some investment guru! I still don’t know how I thought it was okay to not keep a word that I gave the divine. I distinctly remember sweeping the entire experience under the carpet and telling myself that it was nothing. God would forgive and accept me. In hindsight, it was not me telling me, but the ungodly whispering in my ears. I failed to see what I had gotten myself into. ***How could I have overseen the biggest miracle in my life and brushed it aside as nothing? How did I believe that there would be no repercussions?*** Repercussions were looming. I wasn’t ready for it. And the repercussions were due to the ungodly. Not God. God, in fact, saved me. Gave me another chance. You’ll see. ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # The Ungodly Came Knocking | I Was Knocked Off by Depression | Found My Footing Again | Thanks to God! My life was going well, successful school and college years, pretty successful and fast-paced work life, but the intermittent failures were there, too. Somehow, the voices only amplified the failures and never let me revel in the successes. And guess what I kept hearing more often? > ‘You don’t keep your promises.’ [My colleagues, friends, and spouse would say] > “You need to keep your promises.’ [My bosses would say] Those statements were hitting alarmingly, closer to home, right? The ungodly voices and the focus only on failures eventually took me down. I was in depression, roughly 33 years after failing to keep my promise with Mother Mary. I am not saying, depression was God’s way of getting back at me. It never was. Depression was my way of moving away from God. I had free will, right? God wouldn’t overrule it. But the devil… that was a totally different ball game. God wanted to help, but I was too focused on the ungodly. However, learning came soon. After a long time, I realized that I couldn’t get away from my promise. I am glad that I realized. Imagine if I had died without fulfilling my promise. Can you imagine what would have happened to me? It would have been an eternity lost. Thank God, I just lost a few years to depression instead of eternity to the ungodly. ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # What Now? | Making My Promise Good One of the problems during my depression phase was the unending torment of the ungodly voices. Torment is an understatement. Those voices drive you crazy and take you to the edge of suicide. Life has improved a lot as I started leaning on my God. Those voices haven’t stopped fully. I still keep hearing them now and then. But during my Rosary phase and praying phase, it just gets silent. Now, I am intelligent enough to know that salvation lies in me keeping my promise first. The engineer (Ok, you don't need an engineer for that) that I am, I calculated the number of Rosaries that I haven’t done. So, that’s a total of 34 years since the ‘thorn in the throat’ episode. The number of rosaries, therefore, is: 34*365, which leads to a total of 12,410 Rosaries. Remember that it was one Rosary per day. In other words, I would have to do 34 Rosaries every day to complete my backlog. If I do 10 Rosaries every day, then I will be able to complete the backlog in 3.4 years. Phew, some task! But better to get a chance to complete it in this life than no chance in the next one. I am glad that I will be able to keep my promise. And I hope that by keeping a promise made to God, I will also learn to take promises seriously and keep them with others, too! ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) Image Courtesy: Image Made on Grok | AI </div>
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permlinkthorn-in-the-throat-or-betrayed-promise-or-depression-or-gods-saving-or-single-story-connected-experience
titleThorn in the Throat | Betrayed Promise | Depression | God’s Saving | Single Story Connected Experience
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      "body": "<div class=\"text-justify\">\n\n#  Thorn in the Throat\n\nI think I was ten or eleven years old when, while having my food, a fish bone decided to lodge itself in my throat. Now, that wasn’t new. Like any fish-eating human, it was expected to happen, had happened to me before, but it eventually got washed down the throat. So, it was a momentary pain, and then it was all fine.\n\nNot this time, though. For some reason, this fish bone had a bone to pick. It wouldn’t budge. I could feel the painful prick each time I swallowed. We tried everything – swallowing a handful of rice, a banana, drinking water, and repeating each one at least three times. It didn’t work. To make matters worse, it was nighttime. There would be no doctors. If I needed medical help, then a hospital was the only solution. The hospital is a place we went to if there was something seriously wrong, not for trivial issues.\n\n\n\n![Thorn in Throat_AI_Grok.jpeg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23vi6K7nhbCcmbFgyquRRnLzoyyR76F9RS3R8sEJJtXHujLpJnBLworHU6XC9DqqiPXPs.jpeg)\n\n<u>Image Made on Grok | AI</u>\n\nIt looked like the hospital was very much on the cards. I could see my dad tense, mom worried, sis confused, and I was s*it scared. I didn’t know what to do. I could feel the pain just while swallowing my saliva. But if I said I felt the pain, then everybody around me would continue to be worried, and at that point, the only alternative was not an alternative at all.\n\nI think that was my first memory of making a decision, a painful one. I lied that the thorn had washed down. It hadn’t, but the relief at home was worth it, and of course, a temporary relief for me.\n\nThe problem wasn’t over, though. \n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n#  Prayed to Mother Mary | Promised Something | Thorn Gone | Promise Broken\n\nSo long as I didn’t swallow, there wasn’t any pain. But swallowing your saliva was partly a natural habit. I was scared to do that, though. I went to bed, but I don’t remember how I fell asleep.\n\nThe next day, being a Thursday, was a school weekly off. So, it was a day to get up late. Not for me. I probably swallowed, and that prick woke me up. Since everyone was sleeping, now was my chance to explore and see if I could do something about it. I took a torch and looked into my mouth in the mirror. I could see the thorn. I tried reaching it, and surprisingly, my index finger touched it. I could feel it, but couldn’t move it. \n\nI was in tears. And then I made the first promise of my life. I had made some earlier also, but I distinctly remember not keeping it. Come on now, I was only ten. But this promise was to Mother Mary. I didn’t know I had to keep it. I remember praying to Mother Mary:\n\n> “Please let this thorn go, and I will do one Rosary every day for the rest of my life.”\n\nNow, this may sound dramatic and miraculous, but I AM NOT JOKING. It wouldn’t have been even half a minute of me praying as above, and the next swallow, I was at ease. I couldn’t believe it. I saw in the mirror once again. The thorn was gone. \n\nI turned to Mother Mary and profusely thanked her. And, of course, did the first Rosary then and there. But I don’t think I went past even half a week before I gave excuses to myself to do the rosary. I literally broke the promise. I remembered it, yet never bothered to make my promise good. \n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n# Unkept Promises With People? | No Repercussions | Unkept Promises With Divinity? | What Do You Think Happens?\n\nThe thorn in the throat episode passed away, but the feeling of relief never did. Even growing up, as a youth, an adult, a married man, and later, a father, I never forgot the promise that I did not keep. And even then, I wouldn’t do the rosary regularly. I would do it as and when I pleased. Normally, prayer was a fifteen-second affair for me, and the Rosary was a full ten to fifteen minutes long. So, I thought that the fifteen minutes weren’t time well invested. I was some investment guru! I still don’t know how I thought it was okay to not keep a word that I gave the divine.\n\nI distinctly remember sweeping the entire experience under the carpet and telling myself that it was nothing. God would forgive and accept me. In hindsight, it was not me telling me, but the ungodly whispering in my ears. I failed to see what I had gotten myself into. ***How could I have overseen the biggest miracle in my life and brushed it aside as nothing? How did I believe that there would be no repercussions?***\n\nRepercussions were looming. I wasn’t ready for it. And the repercussions were due to the ungodly. Not God. God, in fact, saved me. Gave me another chance. You’ll see.\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n# The Ungodly Came Knocking | I Was Knocked Off by Depression | Found My Footing Again | Thanks to God!\n\nMy life was going well, successful school and college years, pretty successful and fast-paced work life, but the intermittent failures were there, too. Somehow, the voices only amplified the failures and never let me revel in the successes. And guess what I kept hearing more often? \n\n> ‘You don’t keep your promises.’ [My colleagues, friends, and spouse would say]\n\n> “You need to keep your promises.’ [My bosses would say]\n\nThose statements were hitting alarmingly, closer to home, right?\n\nThe ungodly voices and the focus only on failures eventually took me down. I was in depression, roughly 33 years after failing to keep my promise with Mother Mary. I am not saying, depression was God’s way of getting back at me. It never was. Depression was my way of moving away from God. I had free will, right? God wouldn’t overrule it. But the devil… that was a totally different ball game.\n\nGod wanted to help, but I was too focused on the ungodly. However, learning came soon. After a long time, I realized that I couldn’t get away from my promise. I am glad that I realized. Imagine if I had died without fulfilling my promise. Can you imagine what would have happened to me? It would have been an eternity lost. Thank God, I just lost a few years to depression instead of eternity to the ungodly. \n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n# What Now? | Making My Promise Good\n\nOne of the problems during my depression phase was the unending torment of the ungodly voices. Torment is an understatement. Those voices drive you crazy and take you to the edge of suicide. Life has improved a lot as I started leaning on my God. Those voices haven’t stopped fully. I still keep hearing them now and then. But during my Rosary phase and praying phase, it just gets silent. \n\nNow, I am intelligent enough to know that salvation lies in me keeping my promise first. The engineer (Ok, you don't need an engineer for that) that I am, I calculated the number of Rosaries that I haven’t done. So, that’s a total of 34 years since the ‘thorn in the throat’ episode. The number of rosaries, therefore, is: 34*365, which leads to a total of 12,410 Rosaries. Remember that it was one Rosary per day. \n\nIn other words, I would have to do 34 Rosaries every day to complete my backlog. If I do 10 Rosaries every day, then I will be able to complete the backlog in 3.4 years. Phew, some task! But better to get a chance to complete it in this life than no chance in the next one. \n\nI am glad that I will be able to keep my promise. And I hope that by keeping a promise made to God, I will also learn to take promises seriously and keep them with others, too!\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\nImage Courtesy: Image Made on Grok | AI\n\n</div>\n",
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2025/12/29 09:17:09
authornamok
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2025/12/27 17:58:03
authornamok
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2025/12/27 05:53:51
authornamok
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2025/12/27 05:12:45
authornamok
bodyTrue. But the thing is if we change our perspective about money, the reality should change too. That's where I am lacking. :)
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2025/12/24 06:33:33
authornamok
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2025/12/24 04:26:36
authornamok
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2025/12/24 04:26:36
authornamok
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2025/12/24 04:26:03
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2025/12/24 04:26:03
authornamok
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2025/12/24 04:25:54
authornamok
body<div class="text-justify"> # Interesting Experience | Unwanted Outcome I had spoken about my energy exercises around money, and how I had a breakthrough in my perception of money. I had spoken about it in my previous article, and those interested can have a read. [Money Problem | Somehow Managed to Drive Money Out of Work | And Hence Had Work But No Money | by Awakenedgyani | Dec, 2025 | Medium](https://medium.com/p/cf9cc1a8fd7d) This article is a continuation of the one above. I followed up with my energy exercises to check for any intense feelings around money after the clearing that I previously achieved. This was a pretty focused one. I mentioned in the article above that somehow I had replaced “stocks” that my friend stated with “money” and thereafter adopted an arms-length approach to money. ![Money_Peggy_Marco_Pixab.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/AK9Tn4NP7rEVtcAMMombhGEUhMQMrMCeNnfocbCKPryQt6eNdgckAMKRerU5h2k.jpg) I was curious to find out why I replaced “stocks” with “money”. Was there indeed an experience behind it, or just another no-specific-cause replacement of one word with another? Boy, was I surprised to know that there was a reason! ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # The Reason | The Experience | And My Dislove for Money Yeah, I invented the word “dislove”. So long as you get the meaning, it’s all fine. So, the reason for the replacement of the word “stocks” with “money” was because of one specific experience that repeated itself over a couple of weeks in my first job. You see, I was working for a client and had finished the job at hand (I was a very quick worker) and literally had almost the entire day at my disposal. I was at the client site and had a room to myself and nothing much to do. I tried completing some work for my office (office of parent company. Not client company), and as luck would have it, I had really rounded up all my work. So, no work. That’s when I said, ‘Ok, let’s look at my stock portfolio. ’ Now, remember, this was my first job, and I had never done anything of this sort before. Why? Simply because I had never invested before, nor was I too much into portfolio checks. But then something happened that got me hooked. As I opened my portfolio, one of the stocks in my holdings just shot up. I remember that distinctly. It shot up so high that it hit the 20% circuit breaker at the stock market. That was an extremely exhilarating and first-time experience for me. I mean, the translation of that 20% upward movement was big on my portfolio. And for the rest of the day, I just kept refreshing my screen. Why? In the hope that my other stocks would also do something similar. In hindsight, what a tiring day it would have been to be just hitting refresh. But the experience did not end there. The next day, at the same client’s office, the same thing happened again. Work allotted, work finished in one hour, no new work, no follow-ups, no parent office work, and literally seven hours at my disposal. I logged in to my portfolio again. The same stock hit the 10% circuit breaker this time. For those who don’t know, in our stock markets, the first time there would be a 20% circuit breaker, and thereafter 10% each day. Again, I was refreshing the screen for something to happen. And here is where my first experience with boredom at work followed (remember, this was my first job). It was tiring as I waited for “something to happen,” and “nothing happened,” and I was tired mentally. This experience followed for the next two days as well. Things were different on the fifth day. I arrived at the client’s location, and there was a lot of work to be done. But none of the work was for delivery on the same day. The earliest one was to be reverted in a week. But I thought I would keep working and check my portfolio once in a while. That made sense, but that’s not what I did. Once I finished some work for about half an hour, I logged into my portfolio. This time, no circuit breakers, but yes, largely all my stocks were in the green. There was a change in experience this time. Despite having work, I did not have much interest in getting back to work as there were no immediate reverts or expectations. So, I went back to refreshing my screen. By now, it was getting tiring for me. I distinctly remember the boredom and tiredness I felt and the odd need to sleep. The saga continued until day eight. On day nine, I had to get a hard grip on myself as I had only three days left to deliver one of the first outcomes to my client. And I remember being able to get back to work and making a conscious choice of not opening my stock portfolio. However, by lunch break, I thought I could just check while I am having my lunch. Bad decision. I fell back into the refreshing-the-screen saga pretty soon. Even after lunch, I remember going back to the page-refreshing, while I lost track of my work. That evening back at home, I felt the worst that I could feel. I was full of guilt that I was using up the client’s time (and his money) to do my personal work. That, too, personal or otherwise, it wasn’t “work” at all. I felt terrible. And here comes the banger that I carried for the rest of my life. This is it: I thought, this focus on increasing my money is an extremely tiresome experience, and it stops me from doing my work. Work and money can’t go hand-in-hand. ***I cannot focus on my work if I am distracted by money.*** Ta-daa. And that was it. That’s where I started believing I should not focus on money (the fact was I was focused on my stocks), or else I wouldn’t be able to do my work. This realization was crazy. It was, after all, having its genesis in my own experience and not my friend’s, as I had earlier thought. What a revelation! ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # Cleaning the Past | Clearing My Mind Once I narrowed it down to that point, clearing things was easier. As I write this article, I have a couple of my crypto portfolios open on other tabs on my laptop. I am smiling to myself that I am focusing on my work of writing this article while not being distracted by the prices. So, my Ho’oponopono sessions to neutralize the experience of “money” and “work” seem to have worked. The new thoughts that I have reinforced are: • My money keeps growing even when I don’t watch it • God’s blessing of money keeps flowing to me • My work focus is so enriching and fulfilling • By God’s grace, both money and my work keep flourishing • If God wills, money and work can go hand-in-hand Man, the relief that I felt after the clearing is amazing! I don’t see money as a distraction from my work anymore. I can be relaxed about money and my work. And this is the exact scenario that I need for myself while running a business. So, work and money can indeed go hand-in-hand. Once again, all this could be possible because of God the Father Almighty, His Son, Jesus Christ, my Savior, and the Holy Spirit. The nudge in the right direction at the right time is what gets me out of trouble always. And it remains so even in this current episode. I am so glad God is in my life!! I hope you find God and his directions for yourself, too. His mercies and divine interventions are incredible! ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) Image Courtesy: Peggy_Marco at Pixabay(dot)com </div>
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permlinkkept-watching-money-or-lost-interest-in-work-or-grew-tired-or-and-then-blamed-money-for-it
titleKept Watching Money | Lost Interest in Work | Grew Tired | And Then Blamed Money for It
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      "body": "<div class=\"text-justify\">\n\n#  Interesting Experience | Unwanted Outcome\n\nI had spoken about my energy exercises around money, and how I had a breakthrough in my perception of money. I had spoken about it in my previous article, and those interested can have a read.\n\n[Money Problem | Somehow Managed to Drive Money Out of Work | And Hence Had Work But No Money | by Awakenedgyani | Dec, 2025 | Medium](https://medium.com/p/cf9cc1a8fd7d)\n\nThis article is a continuation of the one above. I followed up with my energy exercises to check for any intense feelings around money after the clearing that I previously achieved. This was a pretty focused one. I mentioned in the article above that somehow I had replaced “stocks” that my friend stated with “money” and thereafter adopted an arms-length approach to money.\n\n\n![Money_Peggy_Marco_Pixab.jpg](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/AK9Tn4NP7rEVtcAMMombhGEUhMQMrMCeNnfocbCKPryQt6eNdgckAMKRerU5h2k.jpg)\n\n\nI was curious to find out why I replaced “stocks” with “money”. Was there indeed an experience behind it, or just another no-specific-cause replacement of one word with another?\n\nBoy, was I surprised to know that there was a reason!\n\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n#  The Reason | The Experience | And My Dislove for Money\n\nYeah, I invented the word “dislove”. So long as you get the meaning, it’s all fine.  \n\nSo, the reason for the replacement of the word “stocks” with “money” was because of one specific experience that repeated itself over a couple of weeks in my first job. You see, I was working for a client and had finished the job at hand (I was a very quick worker) and literally had almost the entire day at my disposal. I was at the client site and had a room to myself and nothing much to do. I tried completing some work for my office (office of parent company. Not client company), and as luck would have it, I had really rounded up all my work. So, no work. That’s when I said, ‘Ok, let’s look at my stock portfolio. ’\n\nNow, remember, this was my first job, and I had never done anything of this sort before. Why? Simply because I had never invested before, nor was I too much into portfolio checks. But then something happened that got me hooked. As I opened my portfolio, one of the stocks in my holdings just shot up. I remember that distinctly. It shot up so high that it hit the 20% circuit breaker at the stock market. That was an extremely exhilarating and first-time experience for me. I mean, the translation of that 20% upward movement was big on my portfolio. And for the rest of the day, I just kept refreshing my screen. Why? In the hope that my other stocks would also do something similar. In hindsight, what a tiring day it would have been to be just hitting refresh.\n\nBut the experience did not end there. The next day, at the same client’s office, the same thing happened again. Work allotted, work finished in one hour, no new work, no follow-ups, no parent office work, and literally seven hours at my disposal. I logged in to my portfolio again. The same stock hit the 10% circuit breaker this time. For those who don’t know, in our stock markets, the first time there would be a 20% circuit breaker, and thereafter 10% each day. Again, I was refreshing the screen for something to happen. And here is where my first experience with boredom at work followed (remember, this was my first job). It was tiring as I waited for “something to happen,” and “nothing happened,” and I was tired mentally. This experience followed for the next two days as well.\n\nThings were different on the fifth day. I arrived at the client’s location, and there was a lot of work to be done. But none of the work was for delivery on the same day. The earliest one was to be reverted in a week. But I thought I would keep working and check my portfolio once in a while. That made sense, but that’s not what I did. Once I finished some work for about half an hour, I logged into my portfolio. This time, no circuit breakers, but yes, largely all my stocks were in the green. There was a change in experience this time. Despite having work, I did not have much interest in getting back to work as there were no immediate reverts or expectations. So, I went back to refreshing my screen. By now, it was getting tiring for me. I distinctly remember the boredom and tiredness I felt and the odd need to sleep. \n\nThe saga continued until day eight. On day nine, I had to get a hard grip on myself as I had only three days left to deliver one of the first outcomes to my client. And I remember being able to get back to work and making a conscious choice of not opening my stock portfolio. However, by lunch break, I thought I could just check while I am having my lunch. Bad decision. I fell back into the refreshing-the-screen saga pretty soon. Even after lunch, I remember going back to the page-refreshing, while I lost track of my work.\n\nThat evening back at home, I felt the worst that I could feel. I was full of guilt that I was using up the client’s time (and his money) to do my personal work. That, too, personal or otherwise, it wasn’t “work” at all. I felt terrible. And here comes the banger that I carried for the rest of my life. This is it:\n\nI thought, this focus on increasing my money is an extremely tiresome experience, and it stops me from doing my work. Work and money can’t go hand-in-hand. ***I cannot focus on my work if I am distracted by money.***\n\nTa-daa. And that was it. That’s where I started believing I should not focus on money (the fact was I was focused on my stocks), or else I wouldn’t be able to do my work. This realization was crazy. It was, after all, having its genesis in my own experience and not my friend’s, as I had earlier thought.\n\nWhat a revelation!\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n# Cleaning the Past | Clearing My Mind\n\nOnce I narrowed it down to that point, clearing things was easier. As I write this article, I have a couple of my crypto portfolios open on other tabs on my laptop. I am smiling to myself that I am focusing on my work of writing this article while not being distracted by the prices. So, my Ho’oponopono sessions to neutralize the experience of “money” and “work” seem to have worked.\n\nThe new thoughts that I have reinforced are:\n•\tMy money keeps growing even when I don’t watch it\n•\tGod’s blessing of money keeps flowing to me\n•\tMy work focus is so enriching and fulfilling\n•\tBy God’s grace, both money and my work keep flourishing\n•\tIf God wills, money and work can go hand-in-hand\n\nMan, the relief that I felt after the clearing is amazing! I don’t see money as a distraction from my work anymore. I can be relaxed about money and my work. And this is the exact scenario that I need for myself while running a business. So, work and money can indeed go hand-in-hand.\n\nOnce again, all this could be possible because of God the Father Almighty, His Son, Jesus Christ, my Savior, and the Holy Spirit. The nudge in the right direction at the right time is what gets me out of trouble always. And it remains so even in this current episode. I am so glad God is in my life!!\n\nI hope you find God and his directions for yourself, too. His mercies and divine interventions are incredible!\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n\nImage Courtesy: Peggy_Marco at Pixabay(dot)com\n\n</div>\n",
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2025/12/23 16:31:57
authornamok
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2025/12/22 09:32:30
authornamok
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permlinkmoney-problem-or-somehow-managed-to-drive-money-out-of-work-or-and-hence-had-work-but-no-money
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2025/12/22 09:22:51
authorshadeflowersart
bodyThe biggest problem with work and money is that often a worker only gets enough to stay afloat. Inflation and costs eat away at everything.
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2025/12/22 09:17:24
authornamok
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2025/12/22 09:17:24
authornamok
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2025/12/22 09:17:21
authornamok
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2025/12/22 09:17:21
authornamok
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2025/12/22 09:17:12
authornamok
body<div class="text-justify"> # Odd Conundrum As confusing as the main title reads, that’s how I had been going through life for a good amount of time. I couldn’t work the logic behind it, but it went something like this – I shouldn’t be focused on money; instead, I should be focused on work. There’s nothing wrong with the statement, as the underlying assumption is that if my work is good, then money should follow. And I assure you that’s not what I experienced. It was an odd arms-length that I had with money. I used to feel worried if I looked at money for too long. The inner voice/s would be blaring at a high pitch that I should be focused on my job and not money. This was difficult because I could never look at money or the raise that I should be planning. Or even another job with better monetary benefits. ![money_Rilsonav_Pixab.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23rz4wcYPn76tjy7scjjxYLBCSsPDBmjyyHvLJ6nFo4yxxyWgLqc9wPxseGz62gGLKVMY.png) Life was on autopilot – do the work, and money will follow. Until the work remained, but no money. Even then, I was scared to look money straight in the eye. So, I had to plan my work and business without taking money into consideration. I had a ballpark for money from each line of business but would avoid getting into details. It was blatantly silly, comprehensively idiotic, and naturally stupid. How would you run a business whose success is based on the money that you make, and you wouldn’t want to look at money? Well, what can I say? ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # Odds With Money | Nothing New | Same Old Same Old As an energy exercise practitioner, knowing EFT, NLP, and Ho’oponopono and having solved many of the underlying negatives in my life, I have had minimal to no success with money. I’ve been in a job, and I’ve been in business, but without exception, I have been only at loggerheads with money. There is no getting around this. And to let you know, I have tried clearing a lot of things. Some of them are as follows: 1. Money is evil 2. God and money can’t go together 3. Focusing on money will eventually make money my god 4. Those focusing on money don’t become big in life 5. The successful CEOs are the ones who were passionate about work and not money There were many more. But do you see that most of the points make sense and kind of got me opposed to money. This opposition is what I got tamed in all of my energy exercises. Then, shouldn’t I be ok with money? Strangely, no. I still had a problem with money. It was just beyond me how could a CEO or business owner be successful, if they do not think of the money that his/her business would make? It was no longer about the individual alone but about the company as a whole. If I couldn’t be ok with money then there was something drastically wrong. And that scared me. Because I thought, in my eagerness to correct things about money, I would likely get involved with money and eventually make it my god. Oh, baloney. I was screwed. ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # Some Hope | Some Clearing Then I tried a new approach. To not think about money for a certain period of time, until I had no choice but to think about it (bills don't wait for my experiment, right?). Here's what happened. After going weeks without thinking about money, and then, when the bills arrived, thinking about money again, yet keeping an arm's length distance from it, I realized I wasn’t getting anywhere. It was a hopeless endeavor to achieve nothing. But then something chimed. I had to go back to God and the tools in the form of energy exercises that God had shown me. On one of the sessions around money and my inescapable zero traction on the topic, I got back to an old conversation with a friend. This was just around the time both of us had started work, and I got into stock trading in full gusto. So, during one of our evenings catching up, I told him about stock trading and how he could do it too. I remember now what he said: “I don’t want to look at stocks. Because if I do, I will be unable to take myself out of it and will not be able to focus on my work.” This is all he said. I still am clueless as to where the stocks in the statement were replaced with money. It is easy to surmise that stocks were about money, so I am assuming that at some point, I focused too much on what he said and reorganized the statement in my head as follows: “I don’t want to look at money. Because if I do, I will be unable to take myself out of it and will not be able to focus on my work.” Notice how not only did I change stocks to money but also internalized my friend’s statement as my own. If neither of them had happened, I would have been in a better position. So, what did I do next? Energy exercise and relieving myself from the cold embrace of unwanted feelings. So, I reinforced my mind with a new thought that work and money both are fine, and I can work to earn money. It’s absolutely possible and alright. It is also fine to look at money and plan for the amount of money that I would earn. That kind of took away the edge from my mind. I feel a lot freer to look at money and its planning. ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # A Sigh of Relief I’ve got to admit that the kind of suspense and unease around money and the suspended animation in which I placed money seems to have dissolved to a certain extent. I am certain that this would be a strong move forward. I am eager to see how things pan out. For those who are in a similar situation to mine, I hope the article helps, or at least points you in the right direction. I hope you can find the areas to clear and move forward in faith. Above all, it’s by God’s mercy that I could find these corrections, and I will forever be indebted to the Almighty Father, Jesus Christ, His Son, and the Holy Spirit!! ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) Image Courtesy: Rilsonav at Pixabay(dot)com </div>
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permlinkmoney-problem-or-somehow-managed-to-drive-money-out-of-work-or-and-hence-had-work-but-no-money
titleMoney Problem | Somehow Managed to Drive Money Out of Work | And Hence Had Work But No Money
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      "body": "<div class=\"text-justify\">\n\n#  Odd Conundrum\n\nAs confusing as the main title reads, that’s how I had been going through life for a good amount of time. I couldn’t work the logic behind it, but it went something like this – I shouldn’t be focused on money; instead, I should be focused on work. There’s nothing wrong with the statement, as the underlying assumption is that if my work is good, then money should follow. And I assure you that’s not what I experienced.\n\nIt was an odd arms-length that I had with money. I used to feel worried if I looked at money for too long. The inner voice/s would be blaring at a high pitch that I should be focused on my job and not money. This was difficult because I could never look at money or the raise that I should be planning. Or even another job with better monetary benefits.\n\n\n![money_Rilsonav_Pixab.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23rz4wcYPn76tjy7scjjxYLBCSsPDBmjyyHvLJ6nFo4yxxyWgLqc9wPxseGz62gGLKVMY.png)\n \n\nLife was on autopilot – do the work, and money will follow. Until the work remained, but no money. Even then, I was scared to look money straight in the eye. So, I had to plan my work and business without taking money into consideration. I had a ballpark for money from each line of business but would avoid getting into details. \n\nIt was blatantly silly, comprehensively idiotic, and naturally stupid. How would you run a business whose success is based on the money that you make, and you wouldn’t want to look at money? Well, what can I say? \n\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n#  Odds With Money | Nothing New | Same Old Same Old\n\nAs an energy exercise practitioner, knowing EFT, NLP, and Ho’oponopono and having solved many of the underlying negatives in my life, I have had minimal to no success with money. I’ve been in a job, and I’ve been in business, but without exception, I have been only at loggerheads with money. There is no getting around this.\n\nAnd to let you know, I have tried clearing a lot of things. Some of them are as follows:\n\n1.\tMoney is evil\n2.\tGod and money can’t go together\n3.\tFocusing on money will eventually make money my god\n4.\tThose focusing on money don’t become big in life\n5.\tThe successful CEOs are the ones who were passionate about work and not money\n\nThere were many more. But do you see that most of the points make sense and kind of got me opposed to money. This opposition is what I got tamed in all of my energy exercises. Then, shouldn’t I be ok with money? Strangely, no. I still had a problem with money.\n\nIt was just beyond me how could a CEO or business owner be successful, if they do not think of the money that his/her business would make? It was no longer about the individual alone but about the company as a whole. If I couldn’t be ok with money then there was something drastically wrong. And that scared me. Because I thought, in my eagerness to correct things about money, I would likely get involved with money and eventually make it my god. \n\nOh, baloney. I was screwed.\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n# Some Hope | Some Clearing\n\nThen I tried a new approach. To not think about money for a certain period of time, until I had no choice but to think about it (bills don't wait for my experiment, right?). Here's what happened. After going weeks without thinking about money, and then, when the bills arrived, thinking about money again, yet keeping an arm's length distance from it, I realized I wasn’t getting anywhere. It was a hopeless endeavor to achieve nothing. But then something chimed.\n\nI had to go back to God and the tools in the form of energy exercises that God had shown me. On one of the sessions around money and my inescapable zero traction on the topic, I got back to an old conversation with a friend. This was just around the time both of us had started work, and I got into stock trading in full gusto. \n\nSo, during one of our evenings catching up, I told him about stock trading and how he could do it too. I remember now what he said:\n\n“I don’t want to look at stocks. Because if I do, I will be unable to take myself out of it and will not be able to focus on my work.”\n\nThis is all he said. I still am clueless as to where the stocks in the statement were replaced with money. It is easy to surmise that stocks were about money, so I am assuming that at some point, I focused too much on what he said and reorganized the statement in my head as follows:\n\n“I don’t want to look at money. Because if I do, I will be unable to take myself out of it and will not be able to focus on my work.”\n\nNotice how not only did I change stocks to money but also internalized my friend’s statement as my own. If neither of them had happened, I would have been in a better position. So, what did I do next?\n\nEnergy exercise and relieving myself from the cold embrace of unwanted feelings. So, I reinforced my mind with a new thought that work and money both are fine, and I can work to earn money. It’s absolutely possible and alright. It is also fine to look at money and plan for the amount of money that I would earn. That kind of took away the edge from my mind. I feel a lot freer to look at money and its planning.\n\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n# A Sigh of Relief\n\nI’ve got to admit that the kind of suspense and unease around money and the suspended animation in which I placed money seems to have dissolved to a certain extent. I am certain that this would be a strong move forward. I am eager to see how things pan out.\n\nFor those who are in a similar situation to mine, I hope the article helps, or at least points you in the right direction. I hope you can find the areas to clear and move forward in faith. Above all, it’s by God’s mercy that I could find these corrections, and I will forever be indebted to the Almighty Father, Jesus Christ, His Son, and the Holy Spirit!!\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n\nImage Courtesy: Rilsonav at Pixabay(dot)com\n\n</div>\n",
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2025/12/20 17:58:06
authornamok
body<div class="text-justify"> # Feeling Bad For Oneself | Why? The idea of feeling pity for someone else for the struggles they are going through and taking action to help them is seen as a big-hearted approach. To see the discomfort of a fellow human and do something to alleviate that discomfort is surely commendable. And it is. But to take the same term “pity” and apply it to ourselves is actually an incredibly troublesome journey. It is so bad that even the Bible warns against it. ![Pity_Maksymchuki_Pixab.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23tbMLk9UchXJ5yLuW313zZpf2Nnw4nWhCPsQTb8ULahbnsXo7hvsqhsTLpTGWkH2pv2E.png) But why? Here’s why. Self-pity is that journey we take where we tell ourselves, ‘oh, what a difficult life I have had’, ‘oh, how cruel the surroundings had been’, ‘oh, how bad things got’, and ‘oh, it’s the world’s responsibility to make it right’. Now, the last part is the problem. So long as you look at your past objectively, it’s all fine. But the minute you look at it with victimhood and then blame everyone around you for it, you enter the self-pity zone. And it is an absolutely useless territory. You then live a life seeking others’ validation, approval, and assistance. That’s not what strong people do or need. ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # Self Pity | Petty Pity If I can highlight the last part from the previous section – ***‘validation, approval and assistance’*** - this is the hallmark of weak individuals. All the success gurus would tell us that we need to be strong within so as not to seek validation from others. Look at any of the successful entrepreneurs; did they wait for the world’s validation? No, they just took off and provided their service or product to the world. They were strong within. Now let’s look at the opposite kind – the weaklings. In the current world scenario, do you see such weaklings? Those whose feelings get hurt as soon as someone says something incorrect (perceived incorrectly, not really incorrect) about them? Those who expect you to affirm them? Those who seek your validation for their survival? Those who clearly seem to be living in delusion but need us to affirm their delusion? I think you’ve got the drift of who or what I am referring to. This is one of the outcomes of self-pity. This is the - ‘Oh, how the world treats me, the world needs to change’ – philosophy. Absolutely useless, serves no one, and only irritates the world around you. Worst of all, the person in the middle of it gets nowhere and gets, in fact, invalidated by the world. And then they start on an even stronger journey of self-pity. That’s all cool. But why am I speaking about it? Because I, too, went on my own journey of self-pity. Much more respectable journey than the above example, but an equally bad one in terms of outcome. ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # Here’s My Story | Self-Pity | Depression | To Taking God’s Hand to Come Out of It One of the greatest gifts, in my opinion, that I got from my first job was the introduction to Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT). EFT is an energy exercise that we could use to clean up our unwanted feelings. In many cases, these feelings emanate from our past, our childhood, and nobody warned me that I could clear the past, but I would be left with the knowledge of the past. What does that mean? While you clean your unwanted emotions, many of them emanate from our childhood based on our unhappy experiences with our parents, our neighbours, or our friends. Some of these emotions are suppressed, while many are easily accessible once we do the energy exercises. While we can rid ourselves of the emotions, we become aware of what we went through as a child, and that’s where the problem is. So, while the emotions were neutralized, the knowledge of what we went through stays. Now, nobody warned me that I could get into a self-pity mode based on what I endured. We are not to do that. But somehow I did. And as more and more of the past emotions cleared, I became more and more aware of what I went through. And as you know, very soon, I was feeling pity for myself. I did not have someone to slap my back and say, “Get out of it,” and so I stayed there for a long time; a little too long. I later went into depression and got an even stronger reason to feel self-pity. Just to clarify, there were a lot of reasons for my depression, and self-pity was just one of them. And there started the saga of never-ending pity for myself and how the world had been cruel. I am telling you from experience. That’s how you feel. You feel that you are a victim of the world. The fact was, I wasn’t a victim. I was strong for as long as I knew. The only problem was that doing the energy exercises highlighted my weak past. And I stayed focused on my weak past, forgetting that I had a much larger, stronger past. This is where I went wrong. As you can imagine, I came around when I realized that my past was quite powerful and there was hardly anything that could shake it. And, more importantly, I realized even now I was quite powerful. Very powerful. And hence I speak from experience. Self-pity is a useless feeling to carry. The Bible was right. There is no place for self-pity; else you risk becoming a victimhood-filled weakling. You stop being of any purpose and run a 24*7 seeking-validation channel. And that validation will never come, pushing you further into self-pity. ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) # So, That’s What Is Wrong With Self-Pity When you are in that zone, snap out of it. You are way too strong to feel pity for yourselves. Maybe you did have a cruel childhood, but how do you know that those experiences did not shape your stronger self today? How do you know (or not know) that much of your strength today comes from your unhappy past? Truth is, there is no easy way to find it. So, why then subscribe to weakness and embrace self-pity, when the opposite could be true? I have only one thumb-rule: God, the Giver of all, is here to help. He got me out of depression, and he showed me where I went wrong. He works unabated and wants only to prosper me. Find God. He will help you out. Just like God the Father, His Son Jesus Christ, my Savior, and the Holy Spirit worked miracles in my life. Hope this article helps to check where you are going wrong with self-pity in your own life. Be careful and throw it away as soon as possible. ![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG) Image Courtesy: Maksymchuki at Pixabay(dot)com </div>
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parent permlinkmentalhealthawareness
permlinkself-pity-or-perfect-plot-to-stay-stuck-or-wanna-progress-or-discard-self-pity
titleSelf-Pity | Perfect Plot to Stay Stuck | Wanna Progress | Discard Self-Pity
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      "body": "<div class=\"text-justify\">\n\n#  Feeling Bad For Oneself | Why?\n\nThe idea of feeling pity for someone else for the struggles they are going through and taking action to help them is seen as a big-hearted approach. To see the discomfort of a fellow human and do something to alleviate that discomfort is surely commendable. And it is. But to take the same term “pity” and apply it to ourselves is actually an incredibly troublesome journey. It is so bad that even the Bible warns against it.\n\n\n![Pity_Maksymchuki_Pixab.png](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/23tbMLk9UchXJ5yLuW313zZpf2Nnw4nWhCPsQTb8ULahbnsXo7hvsqhsTLpTGWkH2pv2E.png)\n\n\nBut why? Here’s why. Self-pity is that journey we take where we tell ourselves, ‘oh, what a difficult life I have had’, ‘oh, how cruel the surroundings had been’, ‘oh, how bad things got’, and ‘oh, it’s the world’s responsibility to make it right’. Now, the last part is the problem.\n\nSo long as you look at your past objectively, it’s all fine. But the minute you look at it with victimhood and then blame everyone around you for it, you enter the self-pity zone. And it is an absolutely useless territory. You then live a life seeking others’ validation, approval, and assistance. That’s not what strong people do or need.\n\n\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n#  Self Pity | Petty Pity\n\nIf I can highlight the last part from the previous section – ***‘validation, approval and assistance’*** - this is the hallmark of weak individuals. All the success gurus would tell us that we need to be strong within so as not to seek validation from others. Look at any of the successful entrepreneurs; did they wait for the world’s validation? No, they just took off and provided their service or product to the world. They were strong within.\n\nNow let’s look at the opposite kind – the weaklings. In the current world scenario, do you see such weaklings? Those whose feelings get hurt as soon as someone says something incorrect (perceived incorrectly, not really incorrect) about them? Those who expect you to affirm them? Those who seek your validation for their survival? Those who clearly seem to be living in delusion but need us to affirm their delusion? I think you’ve got the drift of who or what I am referring to. This is one of the outcomes of self-pity. This is the - ‘Oh, how the world treats me, the world needs to change’ – philosophy. Absolutely useless, serves no one, and only irritates the world around you. Worst of all, the person in the middle of it gets nowhere and gets, in fact, invalidated by the world. And then they start on an even stronger journey of self-pity.\n\nThat’s all cool. But why am I speaking about it? Because I, too, went on my own journey of self-pity. Much more respectable journey than the above example, but an equally bad one in terms of outcome.\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n# Here’s My Story | Self-Pity | Depression | To Taking God’s Hand to Come Out of It\n\nOne of the greatest gifts, in my opinion, that I got from my first job was the introduction to Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT). EFT is an energy exercise that we could use to clean up our unwanted feelings. In many cases, these feelings emanate from our past, our childhood, and nobody warned me that I could clear the past, but I would be left with the knowledge of the past. \n\nWhat does that mean? While you clean your unwanted emotions, many of them emanate from our childhood based on our unhappy experiences with our parents, our neighbours, or our friends. Some of these emotions are suppressed, while many are easily accessible once we do the energy exercises. While we can rid ourselves of the emotions, we become aware of what we went through as a child, and that’s where the problem is. So, while the emotions were neutralized, the knowledge of what we went through stays. Now, nobody warned me that I could get into a self-pity mode based on what I endured. We are not to do that. But somehow I did. And as more and more of the past emotions cleared, I became more and more aware of what I went through. And as you know, very soon, I was feeling pity for myself.\n\nI did not have someone to slap my back and say, “Get out of it,” and so I stayed there for a long time; a little too long. I later went into depression and got an even stronger reason to feel self-pity. Just to clarify, there were a lot of reasons for my depression, and self-pity was just one of them. And there started the saga of never-ending pity for myself and how the world had been cruel. I am telling you from experience. That’s how you feel. You feel that you are a victim of the world. \n\nThe fact was, I wasn’t a victim. I was strong for as long as I knew. The only problem was that doing the energy exercises highlighted my weak past. And I stayed focused on my weak past, forgetting that I had a much larger, stronger past. This is where I went wrong. As you can imagine, I came around when I realized that my past was quite powerful and there was hardly anything that could shake it. And, more importantly, I realized even now I was quite powerful. Very powerful.\n\nAnd hence I speak from experience. Self-pity is a useless feeling to carry. The Bible was right. There is no place for self-pity; else you risk becoming a victimhood-filled weakling. You stop being of any purpose and run a 24*7 seeking-validation channel. And that validation will never come, pushing you further into self-pity.\n\n\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n# So, That’s What Is Wrong With Self-Pity\n\nWhen you are in that zone, snap out of it. You are way too strong to feel pity for yourselves. Maybe you did have a cruel childhood, but how do you know that those experiences did not shape your stronger self today? How do you know (or not know) that much of your strength today comes from your unhappy past? Truth is, there is no easy way to find it. So, why then subscribe to weakness and embrace self-pity, when the opposite could be true?\n\nI have only one thumb-rule: God, the Giver of all, is here to help. He got me out of depression, and he showed me where I went wrong. He works unabated and wants only to prosper me. Find God. He will help you out. Just like God the Father, His Son Jesus Christ, my Savior, and the Holy Spirit worked miracles in my life. \n\nHope this article helps to check where you are going wrong with self-pity in your own life. Be careful and throw it away as soon as possible.\n\n![Line Divider_Spiritu.JPG](https://files.peakd.com/file/peakd-hive/namok/EpGUWGgu1TCqqVP51SqKGHbkB1qvib7rPDFburPpPGYjyvrDX2rdNHYpcHQ4ajgupgq.JPG)\n\n\nImage Courtesy: Maksymchuki at Pixabay(dot)com\n\n</div>\n",
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2025/12/20 11:06:06
authornamok
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namokclaimed reward balance: 0.005 HBD, 0.063 HP
2025/12/20 06:17:30
accountnamok
reward hbd0.005 HBD
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Transaction InfoBlock #102201637/Trx 65d7d1f4931a83e9c4624709907dbb48929a3859
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2025/12/20 05:54:36
authornamok
pending payout0.005 HBD
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2025/12/20 05:54:36
authornamok
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2025/12/20 05:54:18
authornamok
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2025/12/20 05:54:18
authornamok
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weight8454 (84.54%)
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Account Metadata

POSTING JSON METADATA
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JSON METADATA
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Auth Keys

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Public Keys
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Active
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Public Keys
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Posting
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Public Keys
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Memo
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Witness Votes

15 / 30
[
  "arcange",
  "balaz",
  "bdcommunity",
  "blocktrades",
  "bobinson",
  "curie",
  "good-karma",
  "gtg",
  "ocd-witness",
  "qurator",
  "reazuliqbal",
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  "themarkymark",
  "timcliff",
  "yabapmatt"
]