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      "body": "Hey Sis, i feel really, really bad. (sorry about this long reply \"blog-post\", **but i need your help right now...** \n\nSince i almost died 6 months ago in a bad accident, life has been different. Our (mutual friend.. you know who), her vlogging & regular posting (like you do too), so inspired me. She doesn't know that in Bangkok, i came \"this close\" to jumping off the 23rd floor. Being a Pastor who was excommunicated for drinking wine & using medicinal cannabis, had my (x) wife divorce me... it was enough  to drive me into massive depression. \n\nI have known you & her for 7 years (really). I remember the first video of you two together.\n\nSo, after all that (as i was doing exercise on my mountain bike, i was attacked by 2 hawaiian pitbull hunting dogs, and i did see death. But at the last moment, a very real Angel came to my rescue & backhanded those 2 dogs. (not a single tool penetrated this handsome white body) 👀 😆 But it's true. I have blogged on it here on hive. (i don't know how to make a link not so obvious, so i won't add it here).\n\nI have some metal in my right arm, but I'm alive. Then, maybe by accident a video of your friend came on my Youtube feed. I wasn't at all thinking of a \"girlfriend\" i promise. The voice inside me was challenging me to get back on YouTube. \n\nEvery video i watched i got charged up. So, i bit the bullet & ordered a new **Canon G7X mark ii**, the tallest  Manfrotto tripod, LED lights, backdrop material, etc. I was SO excited (i still am). \n\nI began to tweet & hive a bit with her, and we'd joke around (like we do, you know). And with Covid & with almost dying, and your friend inspiring me... I wrote a song about her, and asked if it would be ok to post as maybe my 1st Hive post (coming over from Steemit). She said, \"sure\". I ever showed her the graphic i created with her picture, and it would be (not just a \"song\") but a Motivational Exercise** as a PDF download saying: ***\"If you had one last wish, and you knew you were gonna die... dot dot dot\"*** \n\nBut... 🤧 😔 ... in the 4th month process of working on the song every single day, and the pain in my arm, and the hope that she gave me... I uh... (*\"oh crap, i don't know how to say this...\"*) i... ok, ok. **I fell in love with her.**\n\n ( i know it's so crazy). I live in Hawaii. I don't date, or go out, and have been single for 3-5 years. But i think i embarrassed her, and (in my own stupid, over-eager self).. i accidently chased her away. I don't know how she feels, and i have appoligized, but i still don't know what happened. \n\nI even intentionally made a post today called: ***Robb's Failure Dork Relationship Advice Series [1- 4 Fails to Be Over-Eager and Weird]*** :: https://hive.blog/funny/@transformed/robb-s-failure-dork-relationship-advice-series-1-4-fails-to-be-over-eager-and-weird\n\n### Can you help me, Sis... please ?\n\nI just cannot, cannot know in my heart that i embarrassed here by my song.",
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      "body": "## Shall we set the \"Relationship Dork\" stage a bit...?\nIn order to be an expert in extreme relationship dorkiness so as to attain to a wonderfully depressing level of spiraling downward sadness, such as Robb has⏤ one needs take their time, pull up a chair, grab some ice cream and really dive in the depths of relationship Failure Dork Relationship mess as he has.\n\n\n![Relationship Advice Robb Gorringe.jpg](https://images.hive.blog/DQmSsKCcBogDSQS87CDpVfWNHiokf1WxM4vNXR5WtnSRN7T/Relationship%20Advice%20Robb%20Gorringe.jpg)\n\n![Cool_dorky.png](https://images.hive.blog/DQmaFgP9tsF4Ai7akQwsrBY1UFcYVmPqjteoAyu2AL2MRWj/Cool_dorky.png)\n\n![Robb_Gorringe_has_been_a_Digital_Nomad.jpg](https://images.hive.blog/DQmVJWnP2kcbPcaTZhuRWeTjtYbYL9bJZqM8cNMNXEx6cQe/Robb_Gorringe_has_been_a_Digital_Nomad.jpg)\n\n\n```\n\n\n```\n\nSince Robb wants to be so **creepily** open about the advice that he's learned, he's simply calling it...\n\n### \"Robb's Failure Dork Relationship Advice Series\" (...masters of the universe)\n\n\n![IMG_2286.jpeg](https://images.hive.blog/DQmazgRZyvfMMUiReTFkaNoA7XqK5gJfdnpvFVDsK92JQKH/IMG_2286.jpeg)\n\n\nThis is the first part of the series #1 Robb is going share 4 relationship fails, and each one of them coincides exactly (and in order) and are... Oh-so... **creatively pulled** (*\"...oh yeah, baby... MORE..!\"*) from this simple ***Hitch movie clip***, hardly even 3 minutes. \n\n\n\n\n![creatively pulled.png](https://images.hive.blog/DQmNaKaD2H5awwFQops3T1aL19u68egvsKSxCSZGsXhNtCG/creatively%20pulled.png)\n\n\n# 4 Fails to Be Over-Eager and Weird\n\n### 1. Listening is for <del>Lovers</del> Losers.\n\n<iframe width=\"560\" height=\"315\" src=\"https://www.youtube.com/embed/DSpJQlBJCzA\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture\" allowfullscreen></iframe>\n\nWhen **Hitch** was trying to explain just how important it is to realize that (even though Alegra wouldn't act on some 'random thought', and to not sweat it too much, and that it's \"not a big deal...\"), Albert Brennaman echoed his mentor like the cute pudgy protégé that he is, saying: ***\"...it's no big deal then.\"***\n\nThis is total expert advice that Albert learned well⏤ and freakin' fast too!? (...might I add!)\n\n> \"...dear lord jesus...\"\n\n### Watch how Robb creatively piggybacks on this power-packed truth!\n\n```\n\n```\n\n> **...honestly, Robb... this is the most horrible awesome advice ever!**\n>\n> > *“see... when you understand that having someone so special in your life \"isn't a big deal”, you'll begin to not be so careful all the time. It's basically a \"***Let the chips fall where they may***\" sorta scenario.* \n> > *Others call it the... ***\"I don't give a rip!\"*** approach. And it's unbelievably effective in becoming a Failure Dork as a Relationship expert.* *\n> > *\n> > ==*\"...Mom, can you go into the other room while i talk to my Gamer buddies?  Shhhh.... ***hey combatdude007dash9...*** doesn't anyone know what website has  ***\"creative piggybacking\"*** ?*==\n\n> *\"...Robb! WHERE is my new jar of coconut oil that i just bought and had RIGHT HERE in the cabinet?!!\"*\n\n\n![IMG_1295.jpeg](https://images.hive.blog/DQmczqoC655wfCZCzJexuv253ABHxgqAhUGBAPEfNkHrb5q/IMG_1295.jpeg)\n\n\n\n### 2. When they \"like\" your post, they are... **\"fiddling\"** for attention.\n\nListen, when you're like Robb, and you've done about 13 million of those little blue thingies... \"\"twitter tweets\" (they call 'em), and haven't gotten a single \"like\"... but then ***that special one*** hits that \"like button\".. guess what? \n\nYou just hit the **\"Holy Freakin' Flirting Jackpot!**\n\nYou might as well... **order a ring on Aliexpress right now**.. because... \"dum-dum-da-dum.... DUM-DUM-da-duh-dum...\" ⤵️ \n\n### Somebody going to... <del>Disney Land </del> ...Get married! \n\nSuper obvious. Duh.\n\n![IMG_9429.jpeg](https://images.hive.blog/DQmTwoFjwqXzGK9it35by7CDQwhGHC7yA3meqtuawdvp6y6/IMG_9429.jpeg)\n\n\n### 3. <del>Fools</del>  \"...Smart people\" (actually) rush into make a mess.\n\nStanding on the stairs, Albert implements, what Robb calls... \n\n### *** \"Why wait till we all die of some strange new disease? Freakin' \"lasso\" the one you want with Tony Robbins \"cassette type\" confidence & call it a day!\"**\n.\n***\"umm... i kinda like you a little.\"***\n.\nSee how this Dorky thing works?\n\n**Patient=** They like you... only \"**a little**\"\nBUT....**Charging-in like a fool as if you had one last wish=** ...like a bull in a China Store... dishes breaking everywhere... yeah sure...She'll probably like you a WHOLE LOT acting like that.\n\n\n![IMG_2238.jpeg](https://images.hive.blog/DQmeS8TyfcAUUDeHH8WAFysLfuLkgDnJQENThFsYfiVjq9A/IMG_2238.jpeg)\n\n\nRobb said he saw it in a **War Documentary**, where all these guys in green just started CHARGING!  ... and then there was some gun-shots and explosions.\nSo, Robb decided to implement that style to \"making a bang\" with the a relationship. \n\nUhh... there were some \"Explosions\", but it was more of the silent type. \n\n\n==...'Silent, but... **deadly**'...\"== 😮 😅\n\n> \"...Robert James Gorringe?!!!\"\n\n***\"But Mom? It works like **magic*** ?!! \n\nWhich brings us to our final point, number four... drum roll, please.\n\n![IMG_E2014.jpeg](https://images.hive.blog/DQmTawibYAqCmw6haupUeFqXZwyxLuftU2TYb8Ur5x9t8tS/IMG_E2014.jpeg)\n\n### 4. Avoid awkward silence by implementing **\"The Magic!\"** of being Over-Eager\n\nHitch was trying to teach the **\"90/10 Principle\"** of \"Show Me The Magic\".... which is a little like **The 80/20 Rule**, but overall better and more attractive.\n\nWhen Hitch said, ***\"You go 90% and then let her come the other 10\"***, he was testing Albert as to where he was a 💯 kind of guy, or a \"80/20\" loser.\n\nWell, he sure found out! \n\nIf you want to be Failure Dork, then shackle yourself with a dumb **\"Rule\"** like 80/20 instead of what Robb teaches... \"**a freakin' Principle**\". See the difference? \n\n## If that doesn't work... Try **\"420\"** 😮 😆 \n\n### ***\"Rules without relationship equals rebellion.\"***\n\n\n\n![SZDK9280.jpg](https://images.hive.blog/DQmfQCdBHUcpxLHXtutdxJaT9bNaDFcw27GMXsEh72icTHK/SZDK9280.jpg)\n\n\n==*\"...This Robb fella is really **interesting**'...\"== 😮 😅\n\n> \"...uhh... not really. You're a freakazoid Dummy!!\"\n\n### But... that's why your little bird flew away when your heart felt warm and fuzzy.\n\n.\nRobb, maybe next time you won't scratch his/her (\"...his?\") social media life-screen so much with your **over-eager** sweaty feet either! \n\n..and learn to wait and have some **patience**, and give him/her a little chance to breathe before you hurt them or accidently initiate **\"Social Networking Strangulation\"** which might be a part of our \"Part 2\" of series 'So Sweet!\n\n\n![Rainbow_honolulu_robb_gorringe.jpg](https://images.hive.blog/DQmZdC6nhmu2RsvuDeHiVcd7NWhTRDBLiQTREeSi4UTCkbD/Rainbow_honolulu_robb_gorringe.jpg)\n\n\n\n### 💯 % is better that not having any sense at all.\n. \n\n==*“…Hey Mom... Robb really hit a homerun with this one!”*==\n\nThanks for stopping by... Sorry you did.\n\n> \"...Go to bed, Robb!\"\n\n*Robb Gorringe*\n\n```\n\n```",
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