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      "body": "https://i.pinimg.com/736x/4e/15/00/4e1500f19e71736547302d138024ce87--red-wines-white-wines.jpg\n\n\nMany rivulets have flowed into this collective stream of consciousness. \n\nMore than would fill this bottle of blood-red wine I am holding in my hand. \n\nA new house has entered the equation. Gone are the Palo Alto days, and for that I am **glad**. So glad, its impossible to lay out in exact detail the nature and magnitude of it. But glad. That I don't have to get out of the office and drive up El Camino any more. No more feeling of impending doom and blackness as I turn right into Rengstorff and walk up the stairs to a house of broken dreams. No more quiet despair by a checked sofa set. Matt is gone, moved to Berkeley. Sara is gone, to France forever, to begin a new life and to be re-united with Miriam. We said that we would change the world from this room. We shared code, wine, and so much more. \n\nAnd me? Where have I skipped to? Look this way and that. Perhaps Berkeley is where you think you'll see me wandering, like Matt. But no, that is not the right answer. Amtrak is going increasingly bankrupt and I do not wish to subjugate myself to its whims. Scan San Fransisco to see if I am there. The field in which Skylar has decided to lay down her mattress. But even there, you would be off the mark. No, you would have to pan south for now, to the village of Los Altos, where for now, bereft of bitcoin and any other means of sustenance, I have made a new home on the couch of Angie, Sam and Megan. But I am joyful, because a couch is super-comfort in relation to the life of a wandering designer. At least, I have the same place to sleep every night after a month of locale-less-ness. So the story is complete. No the chapter. This chapter, at any rate, seems to have nicely wound down to a satisfactory ending. \n\nBut is that all there is? No, not by a long shot. Flash back to where you last saw me. To when I walked into Marc's office and told him I was leaving. Only to be stung to the quick by his response \"Sure, if you have remorse, we can discuss it\". Remorse? Remorse, Marc? Why on earth, why in the whole godforsaken fucking world would I feel remorse? Because I'm leaving a bunch of selfish, misogynistic engineers to go out and regain my dignity? Because I didn't tell you my every move along the way? Because you didn't see this coming, and you now feel slighted? Well fuck you. If there's remorse to be had, it must come from you. For draining-of-hope. For having with-held and with-drawn the tokens you said \"would definitely come\". For nothing in return for 2 years of enthusiasm on my part. \n\nBut enough. Blind anger is getting me nowhere, and I must forget this. Put it behind me and accept that fact that it gave me more wisdom than any token ever would. And look at the future with a fresh eye. So I do. Or at least I try. This new gig seems to hold some promise. Evan seems to have a plan for me. It seems too premature to make categorical statements but this seems to hold some promise. \n\nAnd yet. \n\nThere is always an And yet.\n\nSomething still makes me unhappy, cantankerous. Less trusting of people. Silent. What is it? Loneliness maybe. For I feel now the need to have someone to share my highs and lows. A sense of injustice perhaps. For in spite of everything, I cannot shake off the fact that Alex just raised a Series C. Andrea spoke on stage to 1000 people. It reeks of unfairness. And until that is put right...\n\nBut can I fully forget? Can all the cumulative scars be erased? Perhaps, but I think it would take an unexpected positive event. To make Marc-callousness, Sara-departures, friend-group disintegrations, vanished tokens hurt less than they do, something positive needs to happen. \n\nI need, desperately, a re-affirmation of my dreams. Any part of it.  I need a crutch I can use to lift me clear of the other inertial anchors. \n\nBut now, the blood-wine is gone. An empty glass stands in its place. The night is upon us and time must be given its due. \n\nThe answers, if indeed there be some, must wait another day, another week, another year. \n\nA sleeping bag beckons, and I must go it.",
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      "body": "http://creativecan.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/dream-train.jpg\n\n\nA flicker of a dream from last night.\n\nI am sitting in a bogie in rural England... as the train rolls along I am tapping on a half ajar door with a wooden stick... I bought that stick for a tiny sum of ether from someone whose face I can no longer see... another man in a turban takes the stick from me and throws it away... I am annoyed... then he pulls out a flute and starts playing and it is pure joy. The surroundings grow completely silent. Then two other join in. Other miners... for they must be miners... join the fray. They dream up ever more complex sequences, and the music gets ever more intricate... and the symphony continues on and on, in a train with no end. \n\nI don't know what it meant. But I do know this, in my bones. **I** came up with that complexity, with that richness of music that he played / they played, in my subconscious. And that makes me oddly elated. \n\nBecause the answers are inside. The revolution is coming. Soon I will look around at the others and laugh.",
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      "author": "deski",
      "permlink": "re-gess-re-deski-the-dwarf-and-the-elf-20170823t193735639z",
      "title": "",
      "body": "Thanks @gess!",
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      "body": "Nice story!",
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